7 Relationship Tips That Gay Couples Often Forget

Once gay couples have settled into a relationship, things can fall into a bit of a rut. Routines form, the attentiveness that was present at the beginning of the courtship might be replaced by content complacency, and ultimately tensions arise. These simple gay relationship tips may seem like common sense, but you may be surprised at how often people forget about their importance.

 

1. Be Honest

Some people lie to their partners for years out of fear of hurting or offending them, but that can lead to a whole lot of ugliness on all sides. The one being lied to will know that something is wrong, and the one lying may feel more and more frustration about holding back and the relationship may end up suffering badly as a result. This honesty doesn’t have to deal with outright lies, but rather personal interests or preferences that may have changed over the years. Alternately, there could be some serious issues that really should be dealt with, but are internalized out of fear of hurting the other person. Ultimately, honesty really is the best policy, and a strong gay couple will be able to work through just about anything together.

2. Communication is Vital

Very few of us are able to read one another’s minds, so it’s important to express things that weigh on us, whether they’re positive or negative. Little behaviors that bother us can become more irksome over time, so it’s good to address them early, before the irritation accumulates to the point of anger. Similarly, miscommunications can lead to some pretty ugly arguments, so if you’re uncertain about something, try to discuss it calmly so you can sort things out: you may have misheard or misread something your partner said/did and taken it totally out of context, so clarify before freaking out about anything. Even though we may feel that we know our partners well after being with them for several years, remember that we all grow and change over time, and methods of communication must change along with us as needed.

3. Never Take Each Other for Granted

Be aware of every wonderful thing that your partner does for you, and express your gratitude whenever possible. This might be as simple as thanking them for doing the dishes after you’ve eaten dinner, or telling them how much it means to you that they make your coffee/tea exactly the way you like it. They’ll feel appreciated for the love and kindness they show you, and will express their appreciation to you in turn, so no one ever feels like their actions aren’t being acknowledged.

4. Respect Each Other’s Alone Time

Togetherness is important, but just as important (if not more so) is the ability to spend time alone. Too much time spent together can make you irritable, especially if you feel like your personal space is always being invaded. Time alone is necessary for personal reflection, growth, meditation, or even just quiet contemplation. Remember that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and you’ll appreciate your partner a lot more after having some space away from them. If you live together, it might be a good idea to have personal spaces that you can retreat to: either individual offices, or a garage workshop for one person and an attic library for another, etc.

5. Don’t “Let Yourself Go”

It’s inevitable that once certain comfort levels have been reached and closeness wins out over early awkwardness, some behavioral patterns will change. You might not spend an hour prepping before dinner to make sure that you look and smell good, or your boyfriend might wear the same pants for two days in a row without worrying about what you might think of their outfit. That’s totally normal, and really quite hilarious. That said, closer comfort levels don’t mean that you should neglect your personal hygiene, or let your living space fall into complete ruin. You know they’re not going to judge you if you leave pizza boxes all over the floor, but that doesn’t mean that you should. Try to keep things tidy and your appearance a step or two above “slovenly,” and your partner will undoubtedly feel that they’re worth making an effort for.

6. Admit When You’re Wrong (or When They’re Right)

This may be difficult for some people to do, but it really is important. If you discover that you’ve been wrong about an issue/bit of information/whatnot, own up to it: you’ll gain your partner’s appreciation and respect if you do, and if you don’t, you’re just proving yourself to be an immature, pouty jerk. Additionally, if you’ve been discussing something and your partner turns out to be in the right, acknowledge that fact: they may have been filled with self-doubt, and acknowledging their awareness or knowledge may boost their self-esteem exponentially.

7. Have Faith In Your Partner

Having trust and faith in another person can be difficult, especially if you’ve been hurt by others in the past. If you’ve been cheated on or otherwise betrayed by another man, you might worry that the same thing will happen in your current relationship, and this may cause you to imagine things or accuse your partner without just cause. If you find that your own insecurities are poisoning your partnership, talk it out with them and consider seeking therapy: they’re not the person who hurt you, so please don’t assume that just because one person treated you badly, everyone else will too.

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Neil Patrick Harris and husband reveal secret to sticking together

Original story from Gay Times Magazine.

They’ve been an item for over ten years, so what exactly do the How I Met Your Mother actor Neil Patrick Harris and his husband David Burtka put their enduring relationship down to?

“We go to couple’s therapy,” the 41-year-old actor told Life & Style magazine.

“Not that there’s anything wrong, but it’s nice to sort of just talk to someone who is a mediator. That’s helped our relationship.”

The couple cemented their relationship in 2006 when David Burtka temporarily starred in How I Met Your Mother as Scooter, the ex-boyfriend of main character Lily.

Neil Patrick Harris played long-term womaniser Barney Stilton in the popular sitcom that ended in 2014.

The couple also opened up about their relationship in the interview, with Burtka mentioning that his husband leaves him love notes and they’re “always doing romantic stuff.” 

Read more at: Gay Times Magazine.

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Tom Daley And Dustin Lance Black Marry In Fairytale Castle Wedding

Original story from NewNowNext.

Olympic diver Tom Daley, 22, and Oscar-winning filmmaker Dustin Lance Black, 42, have reportedly tied the knot.

The Sun reports that the intimate yet lavish wedding took place yesterday at Bovey Castle in the English countryside.

Read more at: NewNowNext.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

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Why Gay Men Need A Body Positivity Movement, Too

“Too many of us have spent too much of our lives trapped in the closet. May we not spend the rest of them trapped in the gym.”

Original story from HuffingtonPost.

The restaurant had been particularly busy that night, and I was starving. At the time, I was working as a server to put myself through grad school in a whimsical little eatery where the joke was that “in order to be hired, you have to at least be a little curious.” As the night slowed, I wandered downstairs to the kitchen in search of some abandoned nosh, and as I stood in the hallway munching on some chips, one of my coworkers walked by, ran his hand seductively across my waist, and instructed me to remember that “straight skinny is gay fat” with a judgmental glance at my deep-fried snack.

Read more at: HuffingtonPost.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

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Twitter’s gone nuts over these pics of Darren Criss in a tiny Speedo for “American Crime Story”

 

Original Story from Queerty

Twitter is all abuzz about this sneak peak of Darren Criss as Versace in American Crime Story‘s second season.

Probably because it also happens to be our first glimpse of the actor all glistening, wet, muscular, and crammed into a bright pink Speedo.

It’s one party you might want to join in on. 

Read more at: Queerty

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VIDEO: Gay Teen Asks Boyfriend To Homecoming In The Cutest Way Possible

Original Story from Instinct Magazine

Props to this young man for dreaming up a clever, and very sweet way to ask his boyfriend to the high school homecoming dance.

In front of his classmates, the gay teen serenades his love with a variation on Jason Mraz’s song, “I’m Yours.”

Watch the VIDEO

Read more at: Instinct Magazine

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Gay Dating 101: Five Tips for Finding Mr. Right

 

1. Get a life. The most important thing is to be Mr. Right yourself. Finding the right man is not going to change you into a better person than you already are. If you are lazy and self-centered, finding a generous hard working fellow is not going to transform you. If you are boring and a one-dimensional person, finding an intellectually challenging man is not going to change who you are.

Learn how to be interesting, kind, caring, and unselfish. Work hard at changing your character defects. (If you are not sure what they are, ask your mother!) Become more well rounded. Complete your education. Get a hobby. Volunteer and expose yourself to people who are less-fortunate than you are. Travel abroad and see how fortunate we are in the USA. Learn some humility by volunteering to serve others. Take a listening class. Get some counseling if you need to learn to be assertive or how to share your feelings. If you have some childhood traumas deal with them now, with someone who can give you professional help. Continue reading

Queer Prismatic Font Honors Rainbow Flag Inventor

Coming to a protest sign, Pride banner, or queer-friendly space near you.

Original story from Out Magazine

It’s been nearly 40 years since artist and activist Gilbert Baker created the first rainbow flag with his bare hands, dying the strips of fabric and stitching them together one by one. Today the flag, whose colors have been reduced from eight to six over time, flies as a symbol of unity and pride for the LGBTQ community.

Now, thanks to the combined efforts of Ogilvy & Mather, Newfest, NYC Pride, and Fontself, the spirit of the rainbow flag has been infused into a font, with strips of alternating colors laid out to form letters making every word drip with technicolor.

 

Read more at: Out Magazine

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Supreme Court rejects challenge to gay conversion therapy ban

Original story from PinkNews

The US Supreme Court has upheld California’s ban on so-called gay conversion therapy.

 

An appeal to the Californian law, which bans any counselling that aims to change a child’s sexuality, was rejected today.

The most populous state in the US signed into law a prohibition on the use of so-called gay conversion therapy on anyone under 18 years of age in 2012.

Read more at PinkNews 

Gay Rower Proposes to His Boyfriend After Rowing Across The Atlantic Ocean

David Alviar proposed minutes after completing the 3000 mile journey

 

Original Story from Attitude Magazine

A gay rower proposed to his boyfriend after rowing 3000 miles across the Atlantic.

David Alviar, a 31 year old University rowing coach ended the incredible journey with a magical moment where he proposed to his partner, Stanley Lewis, as soon as he arrived on land.

As friends and family waited in Antigua, Stanley stood on the dock alongside them eagerly awaiting the return of his boyfriend, while having no idea he was about to get engaged.

After a massive seven weeks at sea, David dragged himself off the boat and fell to one knee in front of Stanley on the dock. Continue reading