My Boyfriend is Boring: How to Deal With It?

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A boring personality is something I do not know how to deal with. I’m such an extrovert in my every day life that I find it difficult having the patience to deal with dull, shy, or unenthusiastic people, but that’s just me. Every once in a while, however, you start to grow feelings for one of these people – Lord knows how or why. Trust me, I’ve been there.

Having a boring boyfriend is hard. First of all, you feel like a babysitter: “How’s about we go hiking this morning?” “What do you want to do today, baby?” “Don’t you think this is funny?” It seems like you’re constantly trying to pull any form of life that might be trapped inside, desperately waiting to see it, only to be disappointed… again.
Here’s the thing. Some personalities aren’t compatible for each other, no matter how great the sex is. While you want it to be something, it’s never going to last if you don’t click. But you can’t control who you like (we all can attest to that). Sometimes we like the most unexpected people with no real reason as to why. If you’re stuck in a situation with an extremely boring guy, there are ways to try and entertain yourself. I know from experience.

Take initiative when planning things. Boring people don’t like to be at the helm because they’re too dull (sorry it’s true). They probably won’t be the first to text you, Facebook message you or plan dates, you will most likely have to do it yourself. It might seem frustrating at first, but you really need to ask yourself if this man is worth it – if he is, then spending five minutes to call a restaurant, Google cool hiking trails, or research cheap theater tickets won’t matter in the end.
Make him feel like he’s the life of the party, even when he’s not. Trust me, I know how soul sucking this can be, but when he feels confident in his social skills, he will always rise up to meet it. While it feels like you’re giving him your power, what you’re really doing is giving him confidence. He’s your boyfriend – he needs support that he’s doing something right. When he’s getting response as if he were fun, he’ll eventually become more fun.
Hang out with mutual friends so he’ll be in a comfortable zone. He will probably thrive in a setting where he knows most of the people there, so hanging out with mutual friends is always going to be a good idea. They’ll bring out the best in him, which will give you many things to draw from.
Do more things he likes to do, which doesn’t mean you need to sacrifice the things you like to do. You clearly have a greater eye for opportunities so you’ll always find the fun, even if the event isn’t something you planned. The important thing is that he’ll be comfortable with you, which will give you chances to bring him out of his shell.
Mesh your circle of friends. Look for ways to bring both of your circle of friends together, whether they’re from work, the gym, college, old high school friends, whatever! Allow yourselves to meet new people from various times and areas in your life – you will get to know each other much deeper, and probably have a wider understanding of who you are.
Do things you’ve never done before, together. It can be as simple as going on a road trip or trying a new restaurant. When you do something that is new to both of you, it will ignite excitement and enthusiasm to do more. Conversations won’t be boring because they’ll be full of new information relating to your experiences.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

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