Gay Dating Tips for Finding the Right Person

Gay dating tips to help you find love 1: Keep things in perspective

Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life. Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet that special guy.

Remember that first impressions aren’t always reliable. Especially when it comes to online gay dating, people don’t always accurately portray themselves. Regardless of where or how you meet someone, though, it always takes time to really get to know that person. You have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations, some good and some not so good, before you really know him. For example, how well does this guy hold up under pressure when things don’t go well or when they’re tired, frustrated, or hungry?

Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings. Everyone has a flaw—or several—and, for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person he thinks you have the potential to become. In many cases, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. By being honest and shedding all pretense, you’ll encourage the other person to do the same, which can lead to a fulfilling relationship.

Invest in a vertical relationship before you invest in a horizontal relationship. Don’t be too quick to make a relationship sexual as it often becomes harder to develop a good vertical relationship afterwards. Even though it can be difficult in this day and age, try to take your time to get to know someone first. It will only lead to a more satisfying sexual relationship down the road.

Tip 2: Build a genuine connection

The gay dating scene can be really frightening. It’s only natural to worry about how you’ll come across and whether or not your date will like you. Here’s what you can do to get past your nerves and self-consciousness so you can build rapport and forge a great connection.


Focus outward, not inward. To combat first-date nerves, focus your attention outward, rather than on your internal thoughts and feelings. Try to be fully present in the moment: in what your date is saying and doing and what’s going on around you. This will help take your mind off distracting doubts, worries, and insecurities.

Be curious. The best way to connect with someone new is to show genuine interest. When you’re truly curious about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, stories, and opinions, it shows—and they’ll like you for it. You’ll come across as far more attractive and interesting than if you spend your time trying to promote yourself to your date.

Be genuine. Showing interest in others can’t be faked. If you’re just pretending to listen or care, your date will pick up on it. No one likes to be manipulated or placated. Rather than helping you connect and make a good impression, your efforts will most likely backfire. If you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there is little point in pursuing the relationship further.

Pay attention. Make an effort to truly listen to the other person. By paying close attention to what they say, do, and how they interact, you’ll quickly get to know them. Little things go a long way, such as remembering someone’s preferences, the stories they’ve told you, and what’s going on in their life.

Put the devices away. You can’t truly pay attention to anyone or forge a genuine connection when you’re multitasking. Nonverbal communication—subtle gestures, expressions, and other visual cues—tell us a lot about what’s going on in the other person’s head and how they’re perceiving and responding to us. But they’re easy to miss unless you’re tuned in.

Tip 3: Put a priority on having fun

Online gay dating, singles events, and matchmaking services like speed dating may prove successful and enjoyable for some people, but for many they lack spontaneity and often feel more like high-pressure job interviews than fun social occasions. And whatever dating experts might tell you, there is a big difference between finding the right career and finding lasting love.

Think of your time as a single person as a great opportunity to meet new people, expand your social circle, and participate in new events. You don’t have to be the life of the party or be endlessly cracking jokes to have fun. But by pursuing activities you enjoy and by putting yourself in a new environment, it’s likely you’ll meet new people who share similar interests and values. By focusing on simply having fun, even if you don’t meet that special guy, you will still have enjoyed yourself and maybe forged new friendships as well.

Tip 4: Learn to handle rejection gracefully

At some point, everyone looking for love is going to have to deal with rejection—both as the person being rejected and the person doing the rejecting. Some people can be overcome with anger, embarrassment, or anxiety when faced with rejection, or are so frightened of it happening again, they avoid dating or starting new relationships. Others find it so difficult to reject another person, they find themselves caught up in prolonged, unhealthy relationships.

By staying positive and being honest with yourself and others, handling rejection can be far less intimidating. The key is to accept that rejection is an inevitable part of dating but to not spend too much time worrying about it. It’s never fatal.

Tip 5: Watch for relationship red flags

It’s important to be aware of red-flag behaviors that may indicate a relationship is not going to lead to healthy, lasting love. In such cases, it’s better to cut your losses early, rather than invest time in a relationship that isn’t good for you or the other person. Trust your instincts and pay close attention to how the other person makes you feel. If you tend to feel insecure, ashamed, or undervalued, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.

Tip 6: Deal with trust issues

Mutual trust is a cornerstone of any close personal relationship. If there is no trust in a relationship, it’s impossible for you to feel safe and cared for by another person, or to make that person feel safe and cared for. In other words, without trust, lasting love can never blossom. Of course, trust doesn’t develop overnight; it develops over time as your connection with another person deepens and you learn more about each other. However, if you’re someone with trust issues—someone who’s been betrayed, traumatized, or abused in the past, or someone with an insecure attachment bond—then you may find it impossible to trust others and find lasting love.

When you’re unable to trust others, your romantic relationships will be dominated by fear—fear of being betrayed by the other person, fear of being let down, or fear of feeling vulnerable. But it is possible to learn to trust others. By working with the right therapist, you can identify the source of your mistrust and explore ways to build trust in existing and future relationships.

Tip 7: Nurture your budding relationship

Remember that finding the right guy is just the beginning of the journey, not the destination. In order to move from casual gay dating to a committed, loving relationship, you need to nurture that new connection. It’s a process that requires time, effort, and a genuine interest in the other person as a whole. It also requires an openness to compromise and change.

All relationships change over time. You’ll change over time, your partner will change, and so will both of your needs and expectations. What you want from a relationship at the beginning may be very different from what you and your partner want from that same relationship a few months or years down the road.

 

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city.
Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
 
Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is
offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for
credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!
 
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

I Have Low Self-Esteem. Is Online Gay Dating For Me?

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Reader’s Question: Is online gay dating for me? I’m a 40-year-old single gay guy with average looks and great sense of humor but have been overweight for years. I’ve been fat-shamed by family, friends and boyfriends growing up and have extremely low self-esteem. I was also the brunt of a very cruel fraternity prank in college that I have never gotten past. It just crushed me and humiliated me.
After having two short, but painful, relationships in my 20s, I swore off dating for good. I’m no good at it, and the men I attract are cruel. One left me stranded at a restaurant because I wanted him to pay for once; one told me that he was too grossed out to kiss me … The list goes on. You honestly can’t imagine the painful things that have been said about me. And I always blamed myself. So I just said no more.
All these years later I’m wondering if I should jump back in the ring. I still have poor self-esteem and I’m still overweight, but I’m a good person. I just don’t want to be shamed or made to feel bad. I want someone to be on my team for once, and not against me. Am I too old for online gay dating? Have I been out of the game too long? Any advice would be great.

Sincerely,
40YOVirgin

Gay Dating Solutions: Hey 40YOVirgin! This is so nice: it’s very rare that I get a letter from someone who describes themselves with positive adjectives. To me this says you are at a fine starting point for potentially getting into dating again: maybe you feel that you have poor self-esteem, but your letter belies this: you do have a good understanding of the positive things that you bring to the world. Understanding these will certainly help you if you do decide you want to try meeting someone who values and respects you.
You mention a few incidents in your past that have weighed heavy on your conscious when it comes to your relationships with men; I wonder if you have ever talked to a therapist about them? If not, it might be helpful to get some professional help to work on being able to feel better about these events in your past before you pursue experiences that might trigger bad memories or make you feel unduly vulnerable.
Now, is online gay dating the best way to meet someone? It may be because it can give you the opportunity to test the water a bit: corresponding with men before you meet them to gauge your interest or enthusiasm for dating. It sounds like you have been quite hurt in the past, and because of this I’d urge you to remember to take things slowly when you start: it’s OK for your initial forays into internet dating to simply be useful in terms of the exposure that they give you to the idea of dating. Take some time to understand what you like in men and what makes you feel some misgivings. Over the years I’ve gotten much better at realizing that a gut feeling that someone isn’t quite right or kind is usually accurate, not something that I should forgive in the hopes that our interaction improves. Allow yourself the opportunity to tune in to these feelings.
As for the issue of your weight and appearance: so few people in the world fit the mold of what Hollywood tells us is conventionally attractive. And yet so many of us find love anyway. If you’d like companionship, don’t assume that the way you look will be the barrier to it. You are a wonderful person with a good sense of humor. Be forthright about these things and trust that it is possible to meet someone who loves these things, and more, about you.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Gay Relationships: 5 Ways to Find Yourself After a Bad Breakup

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Feeling lost after a bad breakup? While time does eventually heal all wounds, there are some specific things we can do to find our footing again. Here are five ways to find yourself after a bad breakup.

1. Take yourself on dates. Want to go see the latest movie? Take yourself to the movie theater. Have a favorite restaurant you haven’t been letting yourself go to by yourself? Just go! Want to spend some time at your favorite coffee shop? Take yourself.

Yes, it can feel awkward going to these things by yourself at first, but the more you do it, then the more liberated you will feel. By doing these things because you want to rather than because someone else is willing to go with you, you will not only get comfortable being alone, but you will also feel more free and empowered in your own life.


2. Go on a vacation alone. 
I seriously can’t recommend this enough. When we go on vacation alone, two main things happen: A) We learn to really focus on ourselves and our own needs. So if you really don’t feel like going to that one museum by the end of the day, so what?! The decision is all on you. And B) We learn to really get comfortable reaching out to other travelers or locals for help. Any shyness goes out the window quickly!

As a result, we can find ourselves feeling so much more in control of our lives, more aware of ourselves (I mean, how can we not if we’re not around someone else 24/7?) and more empowered by feeling like we can literally do and tackle anything!
So, wherever it is that you want to go — Europe, Asia, Mexico, Brazil or maybe even just the a few hundred miles away — wherever it is, make plans and go do it!


3. Find things that you enjoy doing… then go do them! Did you used to love dancing, but you’ve stopped in the last few years? Start doing it again! Did you used to love keeping a garden, painting or working out? Then find time to do it!

Reflect back on all the things that you used to enjoy doing in your life — as a young kid, a teenager, even just a few years ago. Write all these things down on a list and make it a goal to start doing them again!


4. Do something you’ve always wanted to do, but haven’t done. Is there anything you’ve always dreamed of doing, but you haven’t give yourself the opportunity to do it? This could be learning how to shoot a gun, how to speak a new language, how to play piano, how to play the guitar, etc. It may also not have to do with learning anything at all, but to just go somewhere and do something. Like to go hiking in a certain place or to go to a nearby beach or hot springs. Maybe it means to go to a certain shop that you haven’t yet been to or try a certain massage place that a friend has recommended.

Whatever it is, identify it and start looking up classes or ways that you can do these things!


5. Shower yourself with “gifts.” In other words, become a “self-care master.” So make yourself a healthy home-cooked meal. Give yourself a relaxing bath filled with epsom salts, essential oils, candles and soothing music. Go on daily walks in nature. Read a book from one of your favorite authors. Buy yourself some of your favorite flowers.

Give yourself things that you love and enjoy because you deserve it! When we shower ourselves with gifts, we shower ourselves with the love we have for ourselves.

Take action now!
In the comments below, share at least one of the things from the list above that you are going to (or at least plan to do) for yourself this week!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?



Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Gay Singles 101: How to Make The First Move

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We’ve been getting a lot of questions on flirting and how to make the first move. Well, today is your lucky day because we’re going to let you know some tips that will not only get his attention, but also create a curiosity to leave him wanting more.

1. Lock Eyes With Your Target

It amazes me how many gay guys have a problem looking into another gay man’s eyes while flirting with him. Maybe it’s shyness, maybe it’s a fear of rejection… who knows?! Whatever the case is, this is a very important step because it’s the jump off point to creating a visual connection.

What to do: Make eye contact and hold it just a little bit longer than you would with anyone else. The 3 second rule applies here. Don’t hold your gaze for longer than 3 seconds or it will creep the hell out of him. Break your gaze and then look over at them again. The goal is to get his attention and connect. Read his body language and if you catch him looking back at you… Then it’s game on.

2. Break The Ice

Now that you have his attention, you should be thinking of ways to break the ice and start a conversation with him.

What to do: Be aware of your surroundings and his. Slyly size him up for clues as to what his interests are. This should be easy depending on where you are. If that fails, look for positive things that stand out about him or his actions. Use it to make your introduction. Ask him his name and get the conversation going.

WARNING: Do not discuss religion, politics, sex or past relationships. Keep the conversation light and easy going. The conversation should be two-sided so make sure you are actively listening to what he is saying.

3. Body Language

It has been said that a large percentage of human communication is done through posture, gestures, facial expressions and other movements. No matter what we are expressing verbally, our body language sends subconscious signals to everyone we interact with. Use it to your advantage.
What to do: Make sure your body language compliments your words and your intent. This means stand up straight and poke your chest out to show confidence. Lean into the conversation and tilt your head to show that you are interested in what he is saying. Most importantly, smile damn it!

4. Your In, Now Get Out!

Alright, now this one is a biggie and you’re probably thinking “what in the hell..?”  Remember I said to keep the conversation light and easy going? There is a reason for this because now you are going to make your exit. This is going to create some mystery and make him want to know a little more about you.
Long conversations with strangers can become boring and just a tad bit awkward because the longer you talk, the less you have to discuss in the future. Keeping it brief will ensure you don’t say the wrong thing and also keep you from being a motor mouth.

What to do: Your conversation with him should last no more than 5 minutes. Simply say “it was a pleasure to meet you, but I have to get going.” Ask him would he like to exchange numbers and if he agrees, ASK PERMISSION to give him a call later that evening. It shows you are respectful of his time and he will most likely say “YES.”
There you have it! 4 Tips to help you get your gay flirt on and make the first move. Not only have I taught this technique to my clients, but I have personally used them. Practice makes perfect but once you get the hang of it, you will notice these flirts will convert to more dates.

Happy Hunting!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

Gay Dating 101: Love Yourself First

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“If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you’re gonna love somebody else?” – RuPaul

We live in a world that tells us to put our own needs last and that we need to seek validation from other people.
You may have heard “you have to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you,” and I’m here to say that this rule is really true! Self-love is essential for creating any healthy (emphasis on healthy), sustainable relationship with another person or people.
If you scoff at this principle, let me explain why it’s legit. Think of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, which essentially qualifies what we need in order to survive and thrive as humans, starting with basic biological needs like drinking water and eating food, all the way up to self-actualization, or fulfilling your goals and seeking personal growth. What I want to emphasize here is that you have to take care of your own needs in all of these areas before you can take care of anyone else’s, and that’s the entire premise behind this tool. You can’t be expected to grow food for others if you’re starving yourself, or keep someone safe if you’re in danger. You have to take care of you, first and foremost!
Another way of looking at this would be the safety instructions you hear when you fly on an airplane about oxygen masks. You probably already know them without me telling you, but the flight attendants will always tell you to put your own mask on before you assist others around you. The same principle applies to love.
See what I mean? Love is a need that we all have, but we can’t expect other people to give us love if we aren’t giving it to ourselves. You also can’t expect to truly love another until you love and accept yourself; you can’t give what you don’t have.
Self-love isn’t something that we can really measure, but there are some common indicators you can look for to see if you’re loving yourself enough:
Do you constantly find yourself in relationships with abusive or unappreciative people?
Do you find yourself usually being the one who is more interested in other people?
Do you wonder why people don’t flock to you?
Do you feel like you’ve been stabbed in the heart if someone criticizes you?
Can you not bear the thought of someone not liking you?
Answering yes to more than a few of these questions indicates that you probably need a healthy dose of self-love! If that’s the case, don’t beat yourself up or feel bad about not fully appreciating yourself — it’s not your fault. We live in a world that tells us to put our own needs last and that we need to seek validation from other people. It’s only natural that so many of us feel like we don’t measure up.
We can all work on loving ourselves a little, or a lot, more than we do now. Here are a few tips on how you can bring some more self-love into your life:

1. Say “I Love You.”
I read a lot about people who do a certain exercise: You look into a mirror, into your own eyes, and say “I love you” to yourself. It probably will feel silly or embarrassing at first, but doing this consistently for a few weeks or a month is sure to bring about some internal shift. Why shouldn’t we tell ourselves that we’re loved, especially when we’ll do the same for others almost without thinking?

2. Find Out All The Ways You’re Awesome
If you’re struggling to find lovable qualities about yourself, literally sit down and make a list of all the ways you rock. Think about all of your positive attributes, characteristics, charitable acts, talents, skills, and achievements. You can even keep a running list that you add to and look at when you’re feeling down.

3. Use Your Own Love Language
You may have heard of the Five Love Languages, which is a book and theory created by Gary Chapman that says there is a method of communication that you respond to best in receiving love. Although it’s usually thought of as being a methodology to use for couples, there’s no reason you can’t use it yourself! For instance, my love language is quality time, so if I want to show myself some love, I’ll spend some quality time with myself, engaging in activities that fulfill me and uplift me. One way I do this is by taking a day off in the middle of the week that I can use for fun and restoration.

4. Pump Yourself Up
A great way to reinforce your own self-love is to do things you’re good at and enjoy doing. It could be anything from going for a run to writing a poem, anything that gets your juices flowing and you feel passionate about. I guarantee it will help you to gain clarity in how lovable you are!

5. Use Affirmations
Finally, a great way to get into the self-love flow is to use affirmations on a regular basis, and put positive self-talk into your subconscious mind. You could write them down, say them aloud, or just think them to yourself. The point is to say things to and about yourself that are positive in order to shape your mindset in a positive direction.
Remember, the most important thing is to honor yourself, before anyone else, and in whatever way you find resonates with you the most.
Happy self-loving!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?



Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!

Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

Take The Hit: Getting Over Your Fear of Rejection

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Rejection hurts, but it’s the ‘fear’ of rejection that makes it hurt worse. If you want more dating success, you have to learn to take the hit.
For some reason, single gay men everywhere are becoming less confident about making the first move when they see an attractive man giving them the eye. But what truly is the cause?
For a lot of guys in the gay community, it’s hard to compete when there’s so many hot people around. Often times we think we’re not good enough or are afraid of embarrassing ourselves. After all, “keeping it cool” is a major strategy we use when trying to make a good impression. But the truth of the matter is, these fears are only imaginary voices inside our heads. Many times, they’ve been created by either our own insecurities or unfortunate incidents we have yet to heal from.
In order for you to rid yourself of this habit, it’s crucial to give yourself a life review. Go for a walk. Try to remember as far back as you can. Be the detective in tracking down the root of the cause. Once you’re staring at it directly in the face, it becomes much less existent in your life. Trust me, the first step is to find and uncover your own diagnosis. Here’s a few points that might help you along the way:

Rejection Only Hurts as Much as You Allow it to
Here’s why rejection hurts so much: it’s because you give it meaning. You give it power to affect you because you decide how important it is to you. How much rejection hurts is directly proportional to how much emotional investment you have in that rejection.

The “Voices” In Your Head
Insecurity and fear manifest themselves through voices in our head. “He’s totally out of my league” or “He probably has a boyfriend” or “He’d never be interested” or “What if he thinks I’m pathetic?” are all common statements we typically tell ourselves, either consciously or subconsciously.
Many times these voices feel different, sound different, and appear at different times. This is because they’re spawned from different memories within your life, and each circumstance you’re in is probably reflective of that associated trauma. Take it as a hint. Somewhere down the road, have you been tricked into thinking that most attractive guys are out of your league? Does something about this moment feel like déjà vu? Use this as an attempt to find the root of the problem.
These voices inside our head aren’t just holding us back from meeting a potential mate, they also can act as a great tool in deciding if someone’s worth the effort. Knowing that these voices are hidden insecurities and fear, imagine the feeling you get when someone is constantly saying to you, “You’re out of my league.” This, reversely, is how you would appear to them.

“Rejection” Doesn’t Mean You’re Not Good Enough
First of all, let’s stop saying the word “rejection.” The definition of such a word means that someone discards or throws away something that isn’t up to their standards. Overtime, this way of thinking is obviously going to affect our self-worth.
Just because someone says no or is distant from your flirting efforts does not mean that you’re ugly, unworthy, or not good enough. Think about the psychology of it all. People listen to their intuition when they make these kinds of decisions. When someone is obviously detached from making any connection, no matter how hard you think you need to try, it’s really all up to them. So really, it’s their issue. Not yours.
People nowadays aren’t open to find love and are even less open when the opportunity presents itself. Just because someone isn’t making themselves available does not mean it’s your fault. They’re obviously being held down by their own issues. Instead, see it as an opportunity to be proud of yourself for making the move.

Not Everyone You See Is Your Future Husband
Another reason why we tend to beat ourselves up is because we throw all our eggs in one basket. We get so anxious before approaching people that before we even know their name, we’re already picking wedding dates. It’s unlikely the person you approach is as perfect as you think. Remember, they also go to the bathroom just like you – and it’s not pretty.
When you’re not trying, you are less nervous and more able to be yourself. Insecurity is smelled in the air when you’re around more confident people. And simply due to the fact that you’re the one initiating the flirting, the person you’re talking to will naturally be “more confident” just because they have less pressure at that given moment. This makes your desperation more potent. Never let the fear of rejection overshadow your genuine self.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

Gay Dating and the Impact of Social Media

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There are no qualms about it…we live in a digital world now where technology is king and information and immediate gratification is readily available with the click of a button.

It’s even impacted our dating and sex lives.
In a matter of seconds, you can pull up a slew of pornographic images to what your sexual appetite or peruse a gay dating site to scan for potential matches with your cell phone or laptop when you’re on a break from work or traveling home on a subway. It’s that easy now!
But with this quick accessibility and push-button mentality, does it really serve the needs and ultimate prognosis for those single gay men who are seeking a soul mate for a long-term partnership?
Can you find love on Facebook? Is GayDatingSolutions.com and all those other dating sites the answer?
Let’s do an examination of the pros and cons of using social media in your dating efforts to see how it shapes up.

The pros of social media as a dating platform:
In a busy, hectic society when we have little time available to go out socially, if we live in a rural area with lack of access to a visible gay community and find it difficult to decipher who’s gay versus straight when out on the town, social media makes for a great leveraging tool to meet other single gay men.
While we are a lot more “out” and visible than ever before, social media has expanded opportunities for us to meet other men in a way we have never been able to before and has increased the odds of connecting with our single gay cohorts.
Social media has made it possible to get to know someone before actually meeting in person, allowing us to screen for compatibility and saving us time and energy in the process.
As long as this process isn’t too extended, this is a great time management asset.
It’s also a great way to break the ice and can be a good resource for shy guys to practice their social skills.
And let’s face it, it’s titillating! It’s another forum for flirting, confidence-building and revving up the excitement and anticipation of meeting.
But there’s also an inherent risk to this if you’re not careful, as you’ll soon see below.

“Avoid becoming dependent
on one particular dating platform.”


The cons:
Social media is more impersonal and less threatening than face-to-face interactions, therefore it makes one more susceptible to saying or doing things he might not in person and could sabotage a potentially good thing.
Social media has the tendency to accelerate the dating process (or cause it to come to a crashing halt!) if one isn’t cautious.
Because we haven’t met the guy in person to really see his true self, we can begin to build up a fantasy of him in our heads of what we’d like him to be.
Then one or two scenarios can happen:
One, once you meet him in person and the fantasy doesn’t match the reality, all the hopes of a match come crashing down and makes for a very awkward encounter.
Secondly, the fantasy can create an erotic charge that prematurely speeds up the relationship process.
Pacing rituals and the courtship process get thwarted because the connection can get sexualized and boundaries are more likely to get compromised.
What could’ve had a promising future results in a mere hookup situation because a foundation for a relationship didn’t have the chance to properly be established before introducing sex into the equation.
That’s why a great majority of the gay social networking sites are so sexualized. These businesses have capitalized on the fantasy aspect and are raking in millions of dollars because of their recognition of this vulnerability.
And research has shown social media has increased the opportunity and incidence of cheating and affairs for those already in relationships.
Social media can also make communication difficult. The written word in texts or chats can easily be misinterpreted and a lot of erroneous assumptions could be made that might sabotage something from getting off the ground.
Like attorney’s say, “Anything you say in writing can and will be used against you in court.”
Technology can be so easy and addicting that we might be more impulsive and reckless in what we say than we ordinarily would.

So what’s your stance?
Ultimately, you will have to make a personal decision about the role you want social media to play in your dating life after contemplating these (and other) pros and cons.
We are positioning ourselves for loss of human connection and social skill adequacy by relying on technology for our socialization if we’re not careful.
However, by exercising boundaries and good judgment, social media could actually enhance our lives and dating opportunities if used in the right way.
You’ll want to do your due diligence when researching various social networking sites to ensure they market to love and friendship instead of a sexual hookup-based aim if finding a long-term relationship is your modus operandi.
And in the dating world, it will be important to avoid becoming dependent on one particular dating platform to meet your needs. Spread yourself around to a variety of different venues so you have more reach, visibility and opportunities.
What has your experience been like with social media and dating? What are some of your favorite platforms that are truly relationship-minded?

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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2016 is a Great Year for Gay Dating

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OK, so we’re a little late. Happy New Year, and all that stuff. Now let’s get into something more exciting: gay dating. If you’ve been in a rut for a long time and you’re just not sure about getting back in the dating pool, we have one thing to say to you: JUST DO IT!

No, we’re not trying to mock classic advertising slogans. If you’re dreaming about Nikes, that’s your problem. We’re just here to remind you that the person looking back at you in the mirror is a worthy person, and somebody really craves a chance to date you. It might not seem that way — especially for our gay friends in small towns where it feels like you’re the only gay person around. Remember that you’re probably one of the few that have had the courage to stand up and draw attention to the fact that they are indeed gay. There could be dozens more that aren’t ready to come out yet. You should never force someone to come out in order to interact with you, but you can be part of their support system. That matters more than anything else in the world. You just need to make sure that you’re thinking about their happiness too — talk it out and see what stage they’re at. If you’re not where you want to be, seriously consider relocating. There are plenty of gay friendly places around that don’t cost nearly as much as you think. A bigger city can reveal more dating prospects.
If you’re stuck in a rut and you feel like you’re just never going to find the right person to settle down with, answer this: are you honestly looking for someone that’s worth being with? Are you looking for a real relationship, or just a sexual escapade to pass the time? Far too often young gay men confuse the two, and that’s not a good thing either. There is something to be said about waiting to see the relationship develop before you have sex with someone else.
You need to seriously consider dating again, because it has so many benefits. When you’re dating and you feel really good about a new person, it can feel like everything is right in the world. Sure, breaking up is painful but who says that the next relationship won’t last? You have control over that, as long as you don’t give up your control to someone else.
The more thought you put into your gay dating needs, the better off you will be.

Is online dating a good thing for gay men? We think so, but you’re going to want to make sure that you are being as cautious as possible. Make sure that you are meeting in a public place with anyone that wants to see you. Just taking them back to your room could be dangerous — you just never know what anyone’s intentions really are. It could be something that’s really dangerous.
You still want to hold an online date to the same type of standers that you would expect from someone that you want to date in your very own town that you grew up around. You want kindness, understanding, respect, dedication and dignity. That’s something that everyone else wants. There’s no need to feel like it’s impossible to do what you really want in life. 
Everyone deserves love and affection.
It can feel like a long road to honestly find someone that’s worth going out with. Hate to break it to you, but gay dating can be just as complicated as straight dating. Don’t think that just because we’re all gay here that there’s some magical fairy that will just put the right person into your path. You have to go out there and get to know people. Think about some similar interests that you might want to share with someone that. This is the key to finding what you honestly want. That’s the only way that you’re going to connect everything together. It’s tempting to just throw up your hands and say that you won’t be able to get what you truly desire. But you know what? Quitting doesn’t care about your sexual preference — can you really accept just closing the door on all of the possibilities?

Think about it. Good luck!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Dating Again? 5 Tips for Every Single Gay Man

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Being a single gay man is not the worst thing in the world. You have the time to do the activities you enjoy without compromise; you have the freedom to go on as many dates/hook-ups as possible; you don’t have to worry about someone else’s social media activity. But regardless of all the reasons you can come up with to feel good about being single, you may be secretly hoping that your soul mate is right around the corner. So while you enjoy the wonders of being single, here are the top 5 things every single gay man needs to do in preparation for meeting his other half.

5. Have a sense of humor
The gay man is known among his group of friends for his witty observations, sarcastic comebacks and brutal honesty. So chances are you already have a sense of humor, which will come in handy when you go on a date. Mainly because all single gay men will inevitably experience their fair share of weird, awkward and just plain bad dates, and a good sense of humor will help you recover from the disastrous dates. And also because a good sense of humor makes you attractive and fun when you meet a potential match.

4. Work on your physical appearance
Let’s be honest here. A gay man on a date will judge you by your looks. And you can’t blame him; he hasn’t had a chance to get to know your amazing personality yet, so the first impression he’ll have about you is the size of your waist and your fabulous outfit. Make sure you have a gym membership (and actually show up to the gym regularly), and also work on your personal style.

3. Be a good listener
We all know you have a talent to enlighten and entertain a crowd with your passionate conversation, but it’s also important to let others enlighten and entertain you with theirs. So, once in a while, listen to what others have to say and be an active listener. Being an active listener means that you stay on topic and comment on what the other person is saying. When he’s telling you all about one of his exciting experiences, don’t interrupt him with a similar tale of your own. Most importantly, don’t throw in unrelated remarks or compliments. If all goes well, there will be plenty of time to compliment him on his good looks later when the clothes start to come off.

2. Embrace solitude
Now we’re getting to the serious stuff. Before someone else can enjoy your company, you need to learn to enjoy your own company. There’s a difference between being alone and feeling lonely. We want you to embrace being alone. There’s a good chance that most single gay men out there take advantage of the vibrant scene the city has to offer. But after all the fun, don’t be afraid to spend time with yourself. Do activities that bring personal satisfaction and make you happy. Once you feel comfortable in solitude and know all the insights of your life, you’re ready for the number one aspect you need to work on to put yourself on the dating market.

1. Nurture the most important relationship you could ever have, the one with yourself
Frankly, this is the only one that truly applies to everyone. Having a good relationship with yourself is the foundation to having a successful relationships with others. Start by embracing your strengths and weaknesses, then work on connecting with your own emotions. This will help you become emotionally available to your future partner. And like any other relationship, you should have respect, trust and love for yourself.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

Top Rules For Successful Gay Dating

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The words rules and gay should ideally never appear together in the same sentence. For better or for worse, I do believe in rules, if only because I want to know them before I break them.

Here in L.A., we are blessed with the gift of unlimited options. During the winter, we have the choice of heading to the mountains to ski , the beach for some sun or to the valleys for some wine tasting. When we order our dinner, we can choose the dressing on the side, gluten free, egg whites only, hold the bread please- option from the menu.
So, when it comes all the options in the gay world of dating, why do we often forget that even have options available at all?
For example:
We date a guy who is super hot- but has no job.
(or)
We date a guy who only wants an open relationship- because we fear of being alone.
And last but not least,
We date a guy who will (not) come out to his family and would like to keep your relationship a secret. 

All of these options are self destructive and can only lead to heartbreak. So why do we continue to sell ourselves short?  Are we incapable of deciphering the right and wrong path to take when it comes to the matters of the heart?
To help everyone out, I have decided that I will share with you my “Top Rules For Successful Gay Dating”
  • Rule 1. “Let Go Of the Past”

    Every gay man has stories about “coming out”, childhood, family, fear and broken hearts. These are things that color our past but often get confused with what defines us today. It is important to take what has happened to us in the past and use it as knowledge and wisdom and not for something that completely defines who we are and what we are capable of.
    Starting today… let go and create a clean slate in your life. This is so important to be happy not only in your life- but in your relationships.

  • Rule 2. “Be A Gentleman”

    There is nothing sexier to me than when a guy is well mannered. You can have all the money in the world or be extremely good looking- but if you are an asshole- that is all I will see.  So try holding a door open, saying please or thank you- “be courteous”!
    The art of being a Gentleman is long forgotten art and if you can sprinkle it into your life, it will become one of the most attractive things about you.

  • Rule 3.  “Be Chivalrous”

    They often say “Chivalry Is Dead” which I ninety percent agree with. So this is your chance to (as Cher would say) TURN BACK TIME!
    Be the guy who shows up to a date dressed up and not in a t-shirt. Be the guy who opens the car door and surprises their date with their favorite restaurant.
    All these little things matter, and they are important to having a healthy relationship. If you do not channel your inner Mr. Darcy, you will never win over the heart of a good man.

  • Rule 4. “Test Drive, Just Don’t Buy Car”

    We often talk about sex as gay men. How can we not- we are men. It’s in our DNA to be aggressive, alpha and sexual. But when it comes to deciding if we should put out on the first date- its best to slow things down or just be another statistic.
    Sure- sexual attraction is often overwhelming. Half the time I have been on dates all I can think of is how I want to rip the guys clothes off. But this mindset is once again self-destructive behavior.
    Im not saying you can’t make out or heck even do a little dry humping. But just don’t buy the car on our first test drive! If you want the relationship, hold off.
    It’s kind of sexy to build the tension anyway.

  • Rule 5. “Be Assertive”

    Last but not least, be assertive. There is no bigger turn off than a man that cannot commit to a timely follow up. If you like the guy- tell him. Plan the next time you want to see them.
    In a world with technology that enables us to communicate in ten different ways- there is absolutely no excuse to tell you date you had a great time and that you want to see them again.
    If you continue to be the guy who waits till Wednesday for a Saturday plan- you’ll be the guy alone till he is 80 years old.

Incidentally, all these same rules apply to when you are asking someone out (or being asked)on a first date too- so don’t get it confused. Assertiveness should rule all aspects of “committing” to your dating schedule.
Don’t be a flake!
Okay folks, there it is- my Top Rules For Successful Gay Dating.
I beg you to start instituting them immediately and I promise you they will change your love life. They are a simple start to a long-term plan we have to bring happiness back into your life and weeding out all the creeps that keep making their way into dating diet.
Have Fun!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101