LGBT Partners Get The Attention They Deserve On #MilitarySpouseAppreciationDay

Original story from Instinct Magazine.

 

The American Military Partner Association has a presence on Facebook that deserves to be liked and followed. This week, they took to posting pictures of US Military members and their spouses in honor of #MilitarySpouseAppreciationDay!

 

Read more at: Instinct Magazine.

 

 

 

 

 

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Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
 
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Gay Singles 101: How to Make The First Move

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We’ve been getting a lot of questions on flirting and how to make the first move. Well, today is your lucky day because we’re going to let you know some tips that will not only get his attention, but also create a curiosity to leave him wanting more.

1. Lock Eyes With Your Target

It amazes me how many gay guys have a problem looking into another gay man’s eyes while flirting with him. Maybe it’s shyness, maybe it’s a fear of rejection… who knows?! Whatever the case is, this is a very important step because it’s the jump off point to creating a visual connection.

What to do: Make eye contact and hold it just a little bit longer than you would with anyone else. The 3 second rule applies here. Don’t hold your gaze for longer than 3 seconds or it will creep the hell out of him. Break your gaze and then look over at them again. The goal is to get his attention and connect. Read his body language and if you catch him looking back at you… Then it’s game on.

2. Break The Ice

Now that you have his attention, you should be thinking of ways to break the ice and start a conversation with him.

What to do: Be aware of your surroundings and his. Slyly size him up for clues as to what his interests are. This should be easy depending on where you are. If that fails, look for positive things that stand out about him or his actions. Use it to make your introduction. Ask him his name and get the conversation going.

WARNING: Do not discuss religion, politics, sex or past relationships. Keep the conversation light and easy going. The conversation should be two-sided so make sure you are actively listening to what he is saying.

3. Body Language

It has been said that a large percentage of human communication is done through posture, gestures, facial expressions and other movements. No matter what we are expressing verbally, our body language sends subconscious signals to everyone we interact with. Use it to your advantage.
What to do: Make sure your body language compliments your words and your intent. This means stand up straight and poke your chest out to show confidence. Lean into the conversation and tilt your head to show that you are interested in what he is saying. Most importantly, smile damn it!

4. Your In, Now Get Out!

Alright, now this one is a biggie and you’re probably thinking “what in the hell..?”  Remember I said to keep the conversation light and easy going? There is a reason for this because now you are going to make your exit. This is going to create some mystery and make him want to know a little more about you.
Long conversations with strangers can become boring and just a tad bit awkward because the longer you talk, the less you have to discuss in the future. Keeping it brief will ensure you don’t say the wrong thing and also keep you from being a motor mouth.

What to do: Your conversation with him should last no more than 5 minutes. Simply say “it was a pleasure to meet you, but I have to get going.” Ask him would he like to exchange numbers and if he agrees, ASK PERMISSION to give him a call later that evening. It shows you are respectful of his time and he will most likely say “YES.”
There you have it! 4 Tips to help you get your gay flirt on and make the first move. Not only have I taught this technique to my clients, but I have personally used them. Practice makes perfect but once you get the hang of it, you will notice these flirts will convert to more dates.

Happy Hunting!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Gay Dating 101: Love Yourself First

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“If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you’re gonna love somebody else?” – RuPaul

We live in a world that tells us to put our own needs last and that we need to seek validation from other people.
You may have heard “you have to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you,” and I’m here to say that this rule is really true! Self-love is essential for creating any healthy (emphasis on healthy), sustainable relationship with another person or people.
If you scoff at this principle, let me explain why it’s legit. Think of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, which essentially qualifies what we need in order to survive and thrive as humans, starting with basic biological needs like drinking water and eating food, all the way up to self-actualization, or fulfilling your goals and seeking personal growth. What I want to emphasize here is that you have to take care of your own needs in all of these areas before you can take care of anyone else’s, and that’s the entire premise behind this tool. You can’t be expected to grow food for others if you’re starving yourself, or keep someone safe if you’re in danger. You have to take care of you, first and foremost!
Another way of looking at this would be the safety instructions you hear when you fly on an airplane about oxygen masks. You probably already know them without me telling you, but the flight attendants will always tell you to put your own mask on before you assist others around you. The same principle applies to love.
See what I mean? Love is a need that we all have, but we can’t expect other people to give us love if we aren’t giving it to ourselves. You also can’t expect to truly love another until you love and accept yourself; you can’t give what you don’t have.
Self-love isn’t something that we can really measure, but there are some common indicators you can look for to see if you’re loving yourself enough:
Do you constantly find yourself in relationships with abusive or unappreciative people?
Do you find yourself usually being the one who is more interested in other people?
Do you wonder why people don’t flock to you?
Do you feel like you’ve been stabbed in the heart if someone criticizes you?
Can you not bear the thought of someone not liking you?
Answering yes to more than a few of these questions indicates that you probably need a healthy dose of self-love! If that’s the case, don’t beat yourself up or feel bad about not fully appreciating yourself — it’s not your fault. We live in a world that tells us to put our own needs last and that we need to seek validation from other people. It’s only natural that so many of us feel like we don’t measure up.
We can all work on loving ourselves a little, or a lot, more than we do now. Here are a few tips on how you can bring some more self-love into your life:

1. Say “I Love You.”
I read a lot about people who do a certain exercise: You look into a mirror, into your own eyes, and say “I love you” to yourself. It probably will feel silly or embarrassing at first, but doing this consistently for a few weeks or a month is sure to bring about some internal shift. Why shouldn’t we tell ourselves that we’re loved, especially when we’ll do the same for others almost without thinking?

2. Find Out All The Ways You’re Awesome
If you’re struggling to find lovable qualities about yourself, literally sit down and make a list of all the ways you rock. Think about all of your positive attributes, characteristics, charitable acts, talents, skills, and achievements. You can even keep a running list that you add to and look at when you’re feeling down.

3. Use Your Own Love Language
You may have heard of the Five Love Languages, which is a book and theory created by Gary Chapman that says there is a method of communication that you respond to best in receiving love. Although it’s usually thought of as being a methodology to use for couples, there’s no reason you can’t use it yourself! For instance, my love language is quality time, so if I want to show myself some love, I’ll spend some quality time with myself, engaging in activities that fulfill me and uplift me. One way I do this is by taking a day off in the middle of the week that I can use for fun and restoration.

4. Pump Yourself Up
A great way to reinforce your own self-love is to do things you’re good at and enjoy doing. It could be anything from going for a run to writing a poem, anything that gets your juices flowing and you feel passionate about. I guarantee it will help you to gain clarity in how lovable you are!

5. Use Affirmations
Finally, a great way to get into the self-love flow is to use affirmations on a regular basis, and put positive self-talk into your subconscious mind. You could write them down, say them aloud, or just think them to yourself. The point is to say things to and about yourself that are positive in order to shape your mindset in a positive direction.
Remember, the most important thing is to honor yourself, before anyone else, and in whatever way you find resonates with you the most.
Happy self-loving!

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?



Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!

Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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A Gay Man’s Guide to Surviving a Big Break-up

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Breaking up is hard to do, but the few weeks after are even harder. Cutting things off with someone you treasured is heartbreaking, while keeping him around can keep one or both of you stuck in the relationship. Here, three popular options for dealing with your ex after a break-up, how they actually play out—and what they mean for your mental health.

Post-Breakup Strategy #1: The Cold Cut It’s a case of “out of sight, out of mind,” as you completely cut off communication.
A case history: “I was crushed when a guy I was dating for a year broke up with me and said he didn’t want to talk anymore,” says Jay, who works in finance in New York. “I was depressed and felt it was really unfair. But after a while, I did meet someone else. I know now I needed such a clean break, because it helped me move on. I didn’t have any false hopes—I just built myself back up.”
Why this strategy works: Sounds brutal, but it’s popular for a reason. “From a psychological perspective, this is the healthiest strategy, particularly if you’ve been cheated on,” says Joseph Taravella, Ph.D., a couple’s therapist at NYU Medical Center. Taravella says that it’s not an easy choice to stick to, but it pays off by letting you move on. He recommends asking your friends and family to help you stay busy—it’ll help you feel fulfilled and loved, which you need after a breakup. Staying in touch with your ex gives him the power to still hurt you, even if you’re not together—you may still reel when he has a new boyfriend or hold out hope that things will work out. “The patients who take the ‘clean break’ approach generally make faster adjustments and move forward with their lives,” says Taravella. “As a result, they tend to carry less baggage into their next relationship.”

Post-Breakup Strategy #2: The Friend Zone You’re not going to be lovers anymore, but you’ll try to be pals.
A case history: Ed, a writer in New York, has remained friends with his ex-boyfriend of six years, with whom he broke up a year ago. While he appreciates having his ex’s friendship, Ed admits that their emotional intimacy even now makes it hard for him to move on. “I can’t say it’s been easy,” he says. “He started dating two months after we broke up, and I didn’t. It’s not that I wish we were together, but it does get awkward when, say, he wants to bring his new boyfriend to dinner. I’ve vowed to spend a little more time apart from him so I can meet someone, too.”
Why this strategy works: It’s a nice idea, but Taravella warns against this strategy as a means of deluding yourself: “Many people do this when they still have feelings for the other person,” he says. “They hope that, over time, they’ll get back together. But if it didn’t work the first time around, it often won’t the second time.” Partners doing the dumping also like this because it helps them feel less guilty, but it keeps the dumpee hanging on. Still, it’s natural to want a place in your life for someone with whom you shared so much. Many exes find they can be friends—but only once they’ve both moved on so one doesn’t feel judged or rejected by the other person’s dating behaviors. “It generally it takes time for people to get to this place,” says Taravella. A better idea? Take a temporary no-plans-together break, then rebuild the friendship once you’re both comfortable with the relationship’s demise.

Post-Breakup Strategy #3: Exes With Benefits You’re no longer dating, but you still hook up sometimes.
A case history: “I broke up with my boyfriend six months ago, and we’ve been hooking up a couple of times a month since,” says Tim, who works in the entertainment business in Los Angeles. But what he thought was a no-strings attachment turned out to have several threads from their ruined relationship. “I met this new guy, and we started having sex, too. So I told my ex about it, and he got mad. He said I should have told him first. I didn’t know that was part of the deal. I’d think twice about sleeping with an ex again.”
Why this strategy works: Think you’re signing on for an easy booty call? Think again. One person’s mindless sex can be his partner’s proof that the love is alive. “Emotional attachments linger after breakups, and it’s difficult for many people to separate their feelings from sex,” says Taravella. “More times than not, one person is left feeling alone, abandoned, and hurt.” After all, if someone’s told you you’re not good enough to date, why settle for being only good enough to sleep with him? Not only does one person usually think the relationship’s still ongoing, but it makes it difficult for both of you when one person wants out—then you have to deal with another breakup. And it also doesn’t leave you free to date other people and begin sexual relationships with them without baggage. “Ex sex may satisfy certain ‘needs’ in the short-term, but it’s never a good idea,” says Taravella. Now that you know the pros and cons of these three common scenarios, you can proceed with the best chances of a full and speedy recovery should you have a breakup in the future.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Take The Hit: Getting Over Your Fear of Rejection

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Rejection hurts, but it’s the ‘fear’ of rejection that makes it hurt worse. If you want more dating success, you have to learn to take the hit.
For some reason, single gay men everywhere are becoming less confident about making the first move when they see an attractive man giving them the eye. But what truly is the cause?
For a lot of guys in the gay community, it’s hard to compete when there’s so many hot people around. Often times we think we’re not good enough or are afraid of embarrassing ourselves. After all, “keeping it cool” is a major strategy we use when trying to make a good impression. But the truth of the matter is, these fears are only imaginary voices inside our heads. Many times, they’ve been created by either our own insecurities or unfortunate incidents we have yet to heal from.
In order for you to rid yourself of this habit, it’s crucial to give yourself a life review. Go for a walk. Try to remember as far back as you can. Be the detective in tracking down the root of the cause. Once you’re staring at it directly in the face, it becomes much less existent in your life. Trust me, the first step is to find and uncover your own diagnosis. Here’s a few points that might help you along the way:

Rejection Only Hurts as Much as You Allow it to
Here’s why rejection hurts so much: it’s because you give it meaning. You give it power to affect you because you decide how important it is to you. How much rejection hurts is directly proportional to how much emotional investment you have in that rejection.

The “Voices” In Your Head
Insecurity and fear manifest themselves through voices in our head. “He’s totally out of my league” or “He probably has a boyfriend” or “He’d never be interested” or “What if he thinks I’m pathetic?” are all common statements we typically tell ourselves, either consciously or subconsciously.
Many times these voices feel different, sound different, and appear at different times. This is because they’re spawned from different memories within your life, and each circumstance you’re in is probably reflective of that associated trauma. Take it as a hint. Somewhere down the road, have you been tricked into thinking that most attractive guys are out of your league? Does something about this moment feel like déjà vu? Use this as an attempt to find the root of the problem.
These voices inside our head aren’t just holding us back from meeting a potential mate, they also can act as a great tool in deciding if someone’s worth the effort. Knowing that these voices are hidden insecurities and fear, imagine the feeling you get when someone is constantly saying to you, “You’re out of my league.” This, reversely, is how you would appear to them.

“Rejection” Doesn’t Mean You’re Not Good Enough
First of all, let’s stop saying the word “rejection.” The definition of such a word means that someone discards or throws away something that isn’t up to their standards. Overtime, this way of thinking is obviously going to affect our self-worth.
Just because someone says no or is distant from your flirting efforts does not mean that you’re ugly, unworthy, or not good enough. Think about the psychology of it all. People listen to their intuition when they make these kinds of decisions. When someone is obviously detached from making any connection, no matter how hard you think you need to try, it’s really all up to them. So really, it’s their issue. Not yours.
People nowadays aren’t open to find love and are even less open when the opportunity presents itself. Just because someone isn’t making themselves available does not mean it’s your fault. They’re obviously being held down by their own issues. Instead, see it as an opportunity to be proud of yourself for making the move.

Not Everyone You See Is Your Future Husband
Another reason why we tend to beat ourselves up is because we throw all our eggs in one basket. We get so anxious before approaching people that before we even know their name, we’re already picking wedding dates. It’s unlikely the person you approach is as perfect as you think. Remember, they also go to the bathroom just like you – and it’s not pretty.
When you’re not trying, you are less nervous and more able to be yourself. Insecurity is smelled in the air when you’re around more confident people. And simply due to the fact that you’re the one initiating the flirting, the person you’re talking to will naturally be “more confident” just because they have less pressure at that given moment. This makes your desperation more potent. Never let the fear of rejection overshadow your genuine self.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Gay Houston Bar Guide

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WHATEVER YOUR SCENE, YOU’RE COVERED IN H-TOWN 

Visiting Houston and not sure which bars to hit up? Don’t worry, we’ve got this. One good thing about H-town is that there’s a scene for just about whatever you’re into. From stand-and-model to boot scootin’ honky tonk, here’s your personalized hit list for a good time.

DANCE FREAK. Feeling the need to shake it to the latest dance mixes? South Beach is regularly ranked among the top dance clubs in the city. And small wonder with the huge floor space and fantastic in-house DJ talent. For those looking for a more alternative dance scene, check out Blur Bar, where high-energy hip hop and Latin music rule. The second floor balcony is also a great perch for people watching on Pacific Street. 

SONG BIRD. Like to belt out Christina Aguilera like nobody’s business? Head to Guava Lamp on Wednesday and Sunday nights for a karaoke scene like no other. This hidden away video bar off Allen Parkway serves up strong drinks and a fabulous song selection. JR’s on the Pacific Street strip also does karaoke on Thursdays and Sundays. 

PRETTY BOY.  One of Houston’s newest hotspots, F Bar is where you’ll find a beautiful crowd, almost every night of the week. Of course Friday and Saturday nights are the most busy at this upscale, coastal chic lounge. Just down the street is Meteor, another spot where the local boys go to see and be seen. Whether it’s sipping cocktails in the side bar, watching videos and real-life action in the main club or catching up on gossip on the enclosed patio, there’s never a dull moment. Oh, and you’ll love the on-stage showers! 

PARTY GIRL. The top spot for ladies is Pearl Houston. This expansive club smack dab in the middle of Washington Ave. offers tons of big screen TVs to catch games as well as a large outdoor patio complete with fun games and plenty of seating. Multiple bars, darts and much more await at the Pearl. 

URBAN COWBOY. If your idea of a good time is two-steppin’ and shooting pool, we have the perfect spot. Neon Boots is Texas’ largest gay country bar — more than 10,000 square feet of fun under one roof. Dance the night away on the enormous dance floor, relax in the side lounge or belly up to more than a half-dozen different bar stations. There are live shows, dance lessons and much more each week. 

CHILL KID. Sometimes you just want a relaxed night out with your friends. Enter JR’s and Eagle. JR’s has been a staple in Houston’s gay scene for decades, helping form the bedrock of Montrose nightlife. Here you’ll find folks from all over gathered around the numerous bar tops and on the patio from happy hour into the wee hours. Meanwhile, just a couple blocks away is The Eagle Houston, where leather meets neighborhood watering hole. The patio and upstairs deck are fantastic hangout spots in good weather. 

TOTAL DIVA. F Bar isn’t just a cool hang out, it’s also a hub for great shows. Every Tuesday is F Divas, a fabulous show of great drag acts. 

TOUGH GUY. With its darkened ambiance and heavy beat, Montrose Mining Co.offers club-goers yet another option just across the street from JRs and South Beach. This place has an edgier look and feel. So does The Ripcord, a Montrose staple just a few blocks away that offers a leather shop right inside the bar. Finally, check out The Eagle Houston, when they host one of their regular theme nights.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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Gay Dating and the Impact of Social Media

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There are no qualms about it…we live in a digital world now where technology is king and information and immediate gratification is readily available with the click of a button.

It’s even impacted our dating and sex lives.
In a matter of seconds, you can pull up a slew of pornographic images to what your sexual appetite or peruse a gay dating site to scan for potential matches with your cell phone or laptop when you’re on a break from work or traveling home on a subway. It’s that easy now!
But with this quick accessibility and push-button mentality, does it really serve the needs and ultimate prognosis for those single gay men who are seeking a soul mate for a long-term partnership?
Can you find love on Facebook? Is GayDatingSolutions.com and all those other dating sites the answer?
Let’s do an examination of the pros and cons of using social media in your dating efforts to see how it shapes up.

The pros of social media as a dating platform:
In a busy, hectic society when we have little time available to go out socially, if we live in a rural area with lack of access to a visible gay community and find it difficult to decipher who’s gay versus straight when out on the town, social media makes for a great leveraging tool to meet other single gay men.
While we are a lot more “out” and visible than ever before, social media has expanded opportunities for us to meet other men in a way we have never been able to before and has increased the odds of connecting with our single gay cohorts.
Social media has made it possible to get to know someone before actually meeting in person, allowing us to screen for compatibility and saving us time and energy in the process.
As long as this process isn’t too extended, this is a great time management asset.
It’s also a great way to break the ice and can be a good resource for shy guys to practice their social skills.
And let’s face it, it’s titillating! It’s another forum for flirting, confidence-building and revving up the excitement and anticipation of meeting.
But there’s also an inherent risk to this if you’re not careful, as you’ll soon see below.

“Avoid becoming dependent
on one particular dating platform.”


The cons:
Social media is more impersonal and less threatening than face-to-face interactions, therefore it makes one more susceptible to saying or doing things he might not in person and could sabotage a potentially good thing.
Social media has the tendency to accelerate the dating process (or cause it to come to a crashing halt!) if one isn’t cautious.
Because we haven’t met the guy in person to really see his true self, we can begin to build up a fantasy of him in our heads of what we’d like him to be.
Then one or two scenarios can happen:
One, once you meet him in person and the fantasy doesn’t match the reality, all the hopes of a match come crashing down and makes for a very awkward encounter.
Secondly, the fantasy can create an erotic charge that prematurely speeds up the relationship process.
Pacing rituals and the courtship process get thwarted because the connection can get sexualized and boundaries are more likely to get compromised.
What could’ve had a promising future results in a mere hookup situation because a foundation for a relationship didn’t have the chance to properly be established before introducing sex into the equation.
That’s why a great majority of the gay social networking sites are so sexualized. These businesses have capitalized on the fantasy aspect and are raking in millions of dollars because of their recognition of this vulnerability.
And research has shown social media has increased the opportunity and incidence of cheating and affairs for those already in relationships.
Social media can also make communication difficult. The written word in texts or chats can easily be misinterpreted and a lot of erroneous assumptions could be made that might sabotage something from getting off the ground.
Like attorney’s say, “Anything you say in writing can and will be used against you in court.”
Technology can be so easy and addicting that we might be more impulsive and reckless in what we say than we ordinarily would.

So what’s your stance?
Ultimately, you will have to make a personal decision about the role you want social media to play in your dating life after contemplating these (and other) pros and cons.
We are positioning ourselves for loss of human connection and social skill adequacy by relying on technology for our socialization if we’re not careful.
However, by exercising boundaries and good judgment, social media could actually enhance our lives and dating opportunities if used in the right way.
You’ll want to do your due diligence when researching various social networking sites to ensure they market to love and friendship instead of a sexual hookup-based aim if finding a long-term relationship is your modus operandi.
And in the dating world, it will be important to avoid becoming dependent on one particular dating platform to meet your needs. Spread yourself around to a variety of different venues so you have more reach, visibility and opportunities.
What has your experience been like with social media and dating? What are some of your favorite platforms that are truly relationship-minded?

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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The Escalating Demise Of Gayborhoods

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Personal assistant Brenden Michaels is wondering if his days in Brooklyn are numbered. He still clings to a cheap rental flat in uber-gentrified Williamsburg, but has seen his neighbourhood’s prices skyrocket. He now laughingly suspects even the improvements he’s made to his own home may eventually come back to bite him.
“I’ve repainted everything, put plants on the fire escape and done a lot of maintenance. If I leave this apartment it will be in a far better state than when I arrived. And by that very simple step, I have almost gentrified myself out of my own building.”
In many ways, the 29-year-old’s experience is typical of a host of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender city-dwellers. Seeking both an accepting community and affordable rent, they have often flocked together in cheaper areas of inner cities, such as gay-friendly Williamsburg. Their very presence in these areas, however, has allegedly transformed them, accelerating gentrification – and in turn pricing them out.
This LGBT long march through the inner cities is not about housing alone, of course. There is often a corresponding wave among businesses. LGBT bars and clubs have been said to have had a catalytic effect in encouraging a wealthier public back to areas such as London’s Soho or New York’s East Village.
Many western cities have nonetheless been faced recently with an epidemic of LGBT business closures. In London, more than 10 have pulled down their shutters permanently since 2010. This is a phenomenon that has also struck straight pubs and clubs, of course; it’s just that, unlike gay venues, they don’t yet risk becoming an endangered species.
Not all reasons for these closures are entirely bad. LGBT people (or at least those who don’t stand out) can now drink in straight venues with less risk of harassment, while the internet means they no longer need to cluster physically to meet. Nonetheless, displacements and closures are sending a ripple of disquiet through non-straight communities. People are starting to wonder: is gentrification destined to make so-called gay villages a thing of the past?

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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My Boyfriend is Boring: How to Deal With It?

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A boring personality is something I do not know how to deal with. I’m such an extrovert in my every day life that I find it difficult having the patience to deal with dull, shy, or unenthusiastic people, but that’s just me. Every once in a while, however, you start to grow feelings for one of these people – Lord knows how or why. Trust me, I’ve been there.

Having a boring boyfriend is hard. First of all, you feel like a babysitter: “How’s about we go hiking this morning?” “What do you want to do today, baby?” “Don’t you think this is funny?” It seems like you’re constantly trying to pull any form of life that might be trapped inside, desperately waiting to see it, only to be disappointed… again.
Here’s the thing. Some personalities aren’t compatible for each other, no matter how great the sex is. While you want it to be something, it’s never going to last if you don’t click. But you can’t control who you like (we all can attest to that). Sometimes we like the most unexpected people with no real reason as to why. If you’re stuck in a situation with an extremely boring guy, there are ways to try and entertain yourself. I know from experience.

Take initiative when planning things. Boring people don’t like to be at the helm because they’re too dull (sorry it’s true). They probably won’t be the first to text you, Facebook message you or plan dates, you will most likely have to do it yourself. It might seem frustrating at first, but you really need to ask yourself if this man is worth it – if he is, then spending five minutes to call a restaurant, Google cool hiking trails, or research cheap theater tickets won’t matter in the end.
Make him feel like he’s the life of the party, even when he’s not. Trust me, I know how soul sucking this can be, but when he feels confident in his social skills, he will always rise up to meet it. While it feels like you’re giving him your power, what you’re really doing is giving him confidence. He’s your boyfriend – he needs support that he’s doing something right. When he’s getting response as if he were fun, he’ll eventually become more fun.
Hang out with mutual friends so he’ll be in a comfortable zone. He will probably thrive in a setting where he knows most of the people there, so hanging out with mutual friends is always going to be a good idea. They’ll bring out the best in him, which will give you many things to draw from.
Do more things he likes to do, which doesn’t mean you need to sacrifice the things you like to do. You clearly have a greater eye for opportunities so you’ll always find the fun, even if the event isn’t something you planned. The important thing is that he’ll be comfortable with you, which will give you chances to bring him out of his shell.
Mesh your circle of friends. Look for ways to bring both of your circle of friends together, whether they’re from work, the gym, college, old high school friends, whatever! Allow yourselves to meet new people from various times and areas in your life – you will get to know each other much deeper, and probably have a wider understanding of who you are.
Do things you’ve never done before, together. It can be as simple as going on a road trip or trying a new restaurant. When you do something that is new to both of you, it will ignite excitement and enthusiasm to do more. Conversations won’t be boring because they’ll be full of new information relating to your experiences.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

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Gay Relationships: I Cheated on My Boyfriend. Should I Tell Him?

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Reader’s Question: I cheated on my boyfriend and I’m not sure what to do. We talked about having an open relationship and he was adamantly against it—I was for it, did it anyway, and now I feel guilty as hell. I don’t want to lose him, but I don’t want to lie either. What do I do?


Answer:

The age-old “do I tell him I cheated” question remains a controversial topic and is one only you can personally make as it applies to your value system. Having broken the “monogamy contract” in your relationship will likely be hurtful to your partner. All our choices have consequences, and you will need to decide which course of action you’ll be able to live with. Your infidelity is a flag that your current relationship agreement is not working for you. You are doing you and your partner a huge disservice by not discussing this issue further as it will likely continue to eat away at you and cause further problems in your relationship. By not telling your partner, you continue to betray the foundation of trust that good relationships are built upon and further serve to amplify your guilt and damage your sense of integrity and self-esteem. Covered-up truths have a way of coming out in the long run. While it’s scary and you run the risk of your partner’s terminating the relationship, telling him shows that you care for him by being honest. From there, you can determine if the two of you are truly a compatible match, if there are things in your relationship that need work, or if there are issues within yourself that need resolution.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

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