Gay Dating Tips for Finding the Right Person

Gay dating tips to help you find love 1: Keep things in perspective

Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life. Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet that special guy.

Remember that first impressions aren’t always reliable. Especially when it comes to online gay dating, people don’t always accurately portray themselves. Regardless of where or how you meet someone, though, it always takes time to really get to know that person. You have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations, some good and some not so good, before you really know him. For example, how well does this guy hold up under pressure when things don’t go well or when they’re tired, frustrated, or hungry?

Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings. Everyone has a flaw—or several—and, for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person he thinks you have the potential to become. In many cases, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. By being honest and shedding all pretense, you’ll encourage the other person to do the same, which can lead to a fulfilling relationship.

Invest in a vertical relationship before you invest in a horizontal relationship. Don’t be too quick to make a relationship sexual as it often becomes harder to develop a good vertical relationship afterwards. Even though it can be difficult in this day and age, try to take your time to get to know someone first. It will only lead to a more satisfying sexual relationship down the road.

Tip 2: Build a genuine connection

The gay dating scene can be really frightening. It’s only natural to worry about how you’ll come across and whether or not your date will like you. Here’s what you can do to get past your nerves and self-consciousness so you can build rapport and forge a great connection.


Focus outward, not inward. To combat first-date nerves, focus your attention outward, rather than on your internal thoughts and feelings. Try to be fully present in the moment: in what your date is saying and doing and what’s going on around you. This will help take your mind off distracting doubts, worries, and insecurities.

Be curious. The best way to connect with someone new is to show genuine interest. When you’re truly curious about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, stories, and opinions, it shows—and they’ll like you for it. You’ll come across as far more attractive and interesting than if you spend your time trying to promote yourself to your date.

Be genuine. Showing interest in others can’t be faked. If you’re just pretending to listen or care, your date will pick up on it. No one likes to be manipulated or placated. Rather than helping you connect and make a good impression, your efforts will most likely backfire. If you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there is little point in pursuing the relationship further.

Pay attention. Make an effort to truly listen to the other person. By paying close attention to what they say, do, and how they interact, you’ll quickly get to know them. Little things go a long way, such as remembering someone’s preferences, the stories they’ve told you, and what’s going on in their life.

Put the devices away. You can’t truly pay attention to anyone or forge a genuine connection when you’re multitasking. Nonverbal communication—subtle gestures, expressions, and other visual cues—tell us a lot about what’s going on in the other person’s head and how they’re perceiving and responding to us. But they’re easy to miss unless you’re tuned in.

Tip 3: Put a priority on having fun

Online gay dating, singles events, and matchmaking services like speed dating may prove successful and enjoyable for some people, but for many they lack spontaneity and often feel more like high-pressure job interviews than fun social occasions. And whatever dating experts might tell you, there is a big difference between finding the right career and finding lasting love.

Think of your time as a single person as a great opportunity to meet new people, expand your social circle, and participate in new events. You don’t have to be the life of the party or be endlessly cracking jokes to have fun. But by pursuing activities you enjoy and by putting yourself in a new environment, it’s likely you’ll meet new people who share similar interests and values. By focusing on simply having fun, even if you don’t meet that special guy, you will still have enjoyed yourself and maybe forged new friendships as well.

Tip 4: Learn to handle rejection gracefully

At some point, everyone looking for love is going to have to deal with rejection—both as the person being rejected and the person doing the rejecting. Some people can be overcome with anger, embarrassment, or anxiety when faced with rejection, or are so frightened of it happening again, they avoid dating or starting new relationships. Others find it so difficult to reject another person, they find themselves caught up in prolonged, unhealthy relationships.

By staying positive and being honest with yourself and others, handling rejection can be far less intimidating. The key is to accept that rejection is an inevitable part of dating but to not spend too much time worrying about it. It’s never fatal.

Tip 5: Watch for relationship red flags

It’s important to be aware of red-flag behaviors that may indicate a relationship is not going to lead to healthy, lasting love. In such cases, it’s better to cut your losses early, rather than invest time in a relationship that isn’t good for you or the other person. Trust your instincts and pay close attention to how the other person makes you feel. If you tend to feel insecure, ashamed, or undervalued, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.

Tip 6: Deal with trust issues

Mutual trust is a cornerstone of any close personal relationship. If there is no trust in a relationship, it’s impossible for you to feel safe and cared for by another person, or to make that person feel safe and cared for. In other words, without trust, lasting love can never blossom. Of course, trust doesn’t develop overnight; it develops over time as your connection with another person deepens and you learn more about each other. However, if you’re someone with trust issues—someone who’s been betrayed, traumatized, or abused in the past, or someone with an insecure attachment bond—then you may find it impossible to trust others and find lasting love.

When you’re unable to trust others, your romantic relationships will be dominated by fear—fear of being betrayed by the other person, fear of being let down, or fear of feeling vulnerable. But it is possible to learn to trust others. By working with the right therapist, you can identify the source of your mistrust and explore ways to build trust in existing and future relationships.

Tip 7: Nurture your budding relationship

Remember that finding the right guy is just the beginning of the journey, not the destination. In order to move from casual gay dating to a committed, loving relationship, you need to nurture that new connection. It’s a process that requires time, effort, and a genuine interest in the other person as a whole. It also requires an openness to compromise and change.

All relationships change over time. You’ll change over time, your partner will change, and so will both of your needs and expectations. What you want from a relationship at the beginning may be very different from what you and your partner want from that same relationship a few months or years down the road.

 

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city.
Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
 
Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is
offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for
credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!
 
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This heartwarming gay army prom photo that has gone viral will brighten your day

Original article from PINKNEWS
A heartwarming photo of a YouTube star and his soldier boyfriend posing for an Army prom has gone viral.
Max Emerson, an underwear model and vlogger with more than 100,000 subscribers, posted the photo on Sunday, which saw him capture the classic prom pose with his partner Andrés Camilo.

Continue reading

The Dos and Don’ts of Online Gay Dating

Successful online gay dating takes more than a selfie and a dashed-off profile.

Don’t Friend Your Date… Yet

Thanks to countless social networks and dating sites, Cupid’s arrow has been replaced by a wireless signal, bringing with it lots of new head-scratching predicaments. Are you ready to open this cyber can of worms? We recommend ignoring friend requests from potential boyfriends until after you’ve established exclusivity. You won’t want to be in his arms on Friday night, while he’s posting photos with another guy on Saturday night. Digital jealousy in the beginning of your relationship could actually destroy the possibilities of long-term love. We suggest treating a Facebook connection the same way you would a real-life relationship. You’ve been on two or three dates with someone… Would now be the time to introduce this person to all of your friends? Your family? Maybe some exes? No way.

Clean Up Your Facebook Profile

Before you friend your new man or that guy you met last Saturday night, you might want to take the time to do some digital housekeeping. Delete anything on your Facebook wall that could be considered offensive or otherwise hurt your love crusade. Choose a good profile picture (obviously), untag or delete any unsavory photos and don’t whine! Facebook complainers are a huge turn-off. Keep your rants, complaints and cryptic messages to yourself.

Do You Research

When it comes to online dating, we’re complete advocates for doing a little light stalking pre-meetup. Do a quick Google search of your guy and check out his social media accounts. We’re not saying come prepared to recite from memory his favorite movies and TV shows—skim over that stuff, and instead check for red flags like legal trouble or offensive tweets. This is where your own reverse image search could come in handy as well. Just make sure you don’t friend or request anyone you haven’t met in real life yet. That way, your information will be kept private (While you can keep your personal social accounts private, chances are your potential online matches are scrutinizing your dating profiles

Meet in the Real World

It can be tempting to get invested in online chat relationships because they feel safe and manageable, but great conversations don’t necessarily mean great chemistry. Follow the “3-back-and-forths” rule. After three rounds of email replies, you should ask him out on a real, live date. Simply suggest drinks or invite him to be your plus-one at an upcoming event. The worst they can say is ‘no’, and then you don’t get to meet them, which is exactly what was going to happen if you didn’t mention it!

Avoid Relationship Status Limbo

Don’t be too quick on the draw when it comes to changing your Facebook relationship status. You need to make sure you and your partner are on the same digital page before broadcasting to your social circles that you’re “in a relationship”. As for switching back to “single,” notify your ex about your profile update (if the breakup was mutual and amicable). Take note: Removing the “in a relationship” status from your profile will automatically delete it from his. And don’t use the “end of a relationship” feature offered on the new Facebook Timeline layout. To avoid the dilemma completely, consider setting your relationship status to private to avoid awkward comments or creepy “likes.” (Here’s how: Go to your Facebook profile page, select “Edit Profile” or “About,” then edit “Friends and Family” from the left-hand menu and change your “Relationship Status” to “Select Relation.” Save changes.)

Delete Your Grindr

Once you’re in an exclusive relationship, your Grindr needs to come down. Remaining active is disrespectful to your new mate and unfair to the digital love seekers who think you’re still available. Plus, it’s a necessary sign of commitment for some. Don’t want to put all your eggs in one basket? Choose to deactivate your profile rather than terminate, so you can enter the dating game easily if things don’t work out.

Know When to Unfriend

If you don’t want to completely X out your ex, we recommend hiding their Facebook feed to ease the breakup blues. Do the same with their family and/or mutual friends to cut down on the number of ex-related updates. You may want to get in touch with your past love in the future, and re-friending him after an extended period of time could be awkward. So only unfriend an ex if the relationship ended badly, e.g. he cheated or stole from you.

Erase Past Relationships

Want your ex’s grinning mug gone from your digital life? We suggest asking a friend to hit delete on your lovey-dovey couple pics to save you the heartache of reliving happier times. Of course, if your relationship ended on good terms, you might not need to do a total clean sweep. If your current flame remains friends with his ex (and is still tagged in her photos), be confident in your new relationship and just ignore it. Letting him know that it upsets you will only make him realize that you’re checking up on his digital past. 

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!



Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!


Sign-up now: www.gaydatingsolutions.com
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I Have Low Self-Esteem. Is Online Gay Dating For Me?

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Reader’s Question: Is online gay dating for me? I’m a 40-year-old single gay guy with average looks and great sense of humor but have been overweight for years. I’ve been fat-shamed by family, friends and boyfriends growing up and have extremely low self-esteem. I was also the brunt of a very cruel fraternity prank in college that I have never gotten past. It just crushed me and humiliated me.
After having two short, but painful, relationships in my 20s, I swore off dating for good. I’m no good at it, and the men I attract are cruel. One left me stranded at a restaurant because I wanted him to pay for once; one told me that he was too grossed out to kiss me … The list goes on. You honestly can’t imagine the painful things that have been said about me. And I always blamed myself. So I just said no more.
All these years later I’m wondering if I should jump back in the ring. I still have poor self-esteem and I’m still overweight, but I’m a good person. I just don’t want to be shamed or made to feel bad. I want someone to be on my team for once, and not against me. Am I too old for online gay dating? Have I been out of the game too long? Any advice would be great.

Sincerely,
40YOVirgin

Gay Dating Solutions: Hey 40YOVirgin! This is so nice: it’s very rare that I get a letter from someone who describes themselves with positive adjectives. To me this says you are at a fine starting point for potentially getting into dating again: maybe you feel that you have poor self-esteem, but your letter belies this: you do have a good understanding of the positive things that you bring to the world. Understanding these will certainly help you if you do decide you want to try meeting someone who values and respects you.
You mention a few incidents in your past that have weighed heavy on your conscious when it comes to your relationships with men; I wonder if you have ever talked to a therapist about them? If not, it might be helpful to get some professional help to work on being able to feel better about these events in your past before you pursue experiences that might trigger bad memories or make you feel unduly vulnerable.
Now, is online gay dating the best way to meet someone? It may be because it can give you the opportunity to test the water a bit: corresponding with men before you meet them to gauge your interest or enthusiasm for dating. It sounds like you have been quite hurt in the past, and because of this I’d urge you to remember to take things slowly when you start: it’s OK for your initial forays into internet dating to simply be useful in terms of the exposure that they give you to the idea of dating. Take some time to understand what you like in men and what makes you feel some misgivings. Over the years I’ve gotten much better at realizing that a gut feeling that someone isn’t quite right or kind is usually accurate, not something that I should forgive in the hopes that our interaction improves. Allow yourself the opportunity to tune in to these feelings.
As for the issue of your weight and appearance: so few people in the world fit the mold of what Hollywood tells us is conventionally attractive. And yet so many of us find love anyway. If you’d like companionship, don’t assume that the way you look will be the barrier to it. You are a wonderful person with a good sense of humor. Be forthright about these things and trust that it is possible to meet someone who loves these things, and more, about you.

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?

Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!


Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

A Survival Guide to Gay Dating

“I don’t think there’s enough passion between us”, “I don’t think we are a complete match”, “I’m not feeling a click”, “I don’t think there’s enough chemistry on my side”, “We’re not sexually compatible”, “I’m not ready for a relationship”, “It’s not you; it’s me”, “I’d like for us to remain friends”.

Oh…the perils of dating! We’ve all been on the giving or receiving end of these statements and it never feels good either way. Sometimes nothing is ever said, and the situation just fades away causing us even more confusion. Dating can be very difficult, especially in the online environments we often find ourselves.
So how do we take care of our personal well-being in dating situations?

Here are some dating survival tips to consider:
1). Date for dating’s sake – Get rid of the expectation of finding “the one” and just date. Meet people with the intention of getting to know them and learning about who they are. Avoid getting emotionally caught up too soon. Release the pressure and expectation that this might be “the one” for the long-term.

2). Actions don’t necessarily speak louder than words – We’ve all been told that “actions speak louder than words” but this isn’t always so. Be wary of interpreting someone’s actions as meaning that they are into you or that they actually want a relationship with you. Some guys may say sweet things, buy you flowers or gifts, treat you to dinner, introduce you to their friends and family or initiate sex as a part of their own dating rituals. These actions may hold no specific meaning to you whatsoever.

3). Have fun – Enjoy the process of dating. Put your best self forward and have fun. You cannot control another person’s thoughts, feelings or behaviors. You also can’t control the outcome of the experience. You can allow yourself to have fun! Be lighthearted about it all – stay in the moment, enjoy your dates and let go of your attachment to the outcome.

4). Stay focused on your life – Make time to plan activities apart from dating. Remember that dating is only one aspect of your life. Do other things that bring you pleasure and balance your dating life with other important life areas – having a rich full life makes you a very attractive person overall.

5). Learn how to handle rejection – It’s never easy to be let down but don’t personalize the rejection. Recognize that everyone has their own psychological issues and relationship histories that they bring into dating situations. If
someone tells you they don’t want to go forward don’t make it about you. There can be any number of reasons that caused them to back out, and they probably have absolutely nothing to do with you. If you need to, you can talk about the experience with a friend, therapist or coach to help you to quickly move on.

6). Focus on your well-being – Take care of yourself every day by asking – What can I do to take care of myself today?  Perhaps it’s exercising, meditating, or going out with friends or family. Do whatever is meaningful to you. Make a commitment to yourself to do something each day that makes you feel good.

Finally, always remember what my grandmother used to say:
“Men are like buses, there is always another one coming”!






Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
 
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Sign-up now: www.gaydatingsolutions.com
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101
Tweet us: twitter.com/GayDating101

The Dos and Don’ts of Online Dating

These days, going online is as common a way to meet someone as a blind date or the bar scene, and you can connect to gay men of all ages, religions, professions and backgrounds from all over the globe. Online gay dating can be a great tool for broadening your options as long as you are smart, are cautious and take some very important safety steps. 
Creating Your Online Dating Profile
Questions to ask yourself before you write your profile:
  • What is special, unique, distinctive, or impressive about you or your life story?
  • What have you learned about past relationships, in terms of yourself?
  • What are your relationship goals?
  • What personal characteristics (for example, integrity, compassion, persistence) do you possess, and how can you demonstrate that you have these characteristics?
  • Why might you be a stronger candidate than others?
  • What is the single most compelling reason you can give a person to be interested in you?

Follow these tips:
  • Do include a photo. People who’ve uploaded a photo get 15 times more attention than people who don’t have a photo.
  • Make sure you smile in your photos. That sexy face you’re making? It may come across to some people like your scary face.
  • Don’t hide your face behind a pair of sunglasses or a hat. Potential love interests will want to be able to see your face.
  • Do make your headline a grabber. Think of all the great advertising slogans you’ve ever heard. They’re imprinted in people’s minds. You want to do the same thing with your profile.
  • Don’t use clichés. You may love long walks on the beach, but who doesn’t? Say something interesting about yourself that is unique to you.
  • Don’t forget to run spell-check. If you have misspelled words in your profile, it tells the world that you just don’t care about what you’re doing.
  • Do respond to every private message that you get. If you were walking down the street and someone said hello, you’d probably say hello back. It’s the same protocol online. Respond, even if the answer is a simple, “No, thanks.”
  • Keep it light. Your first message should not be a rant about how expensive gas prices are. Keep it lighthearted in tone and keep it simple.
  • Don’t reveal confidential information in your private message exchanges. If you were at a local coffee house, you wouldn’t give out your home address to just anyone standing in line.
  • Don’t meet in person until you’ve actually talked on the phone. You know voice and sound are great way to judge chemistry.

Cyber Safety
  • Verify information on a potential match as thoroughly as possible.
  • Always create a separate e-mail account for your online dating activity.
  • List your cell phone number, not your home number, if the site requires one.
  • When chatting or e-mailing, never give more than a first name, and keep it that way until the first date.
  • Install a privacy checker on your computer. This lets you set privacy standards and be alerted when a dating site doesn’t meet them. These checkers are often free and can be downloaded online.





Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
 
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!

Sign-up now: www.gaydatingsolutions.com
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101
Tweet us: twitter.com/GayDating101

Gay Dating: When Your Online Match Doesn’t Meet Your Expectations

Every date I’ve had in the past year had originated from an online source. One of the earliest began with the occasional hello on gay dating apps and eventually escalated into a full-fledged text relationship. We realized through our incessant messages we were texting on the precipice of a great relationship. Everything was going so well I even included him in my imaginary Oscar acceptance speech because I knew I’d eventually have to thank him for giving me a love I had never experienced before…

…but unfortunately I never would.
We never met in person as the chemistry was flourishing. When we did finally meet, the imminent love I imagined was extinguished before it had the slightest chance to exist. Like the flick of a light switch, in person, he was turned offline.
I let him have the initial blame for our failed relationship, as he had declared himself romantically inexperienced. I assumed the slightest hint of anything real left him longing for the comfort of the confidence he could only get while hiding behind technology. But then I considered my own contribution. I know I’m shy around new people, so perhaps my overtly social online identity didn’t translate well into reality.
After a few months, he broke his silence and confirmed the latter. One of the greatest aspects in the proliferation of social media is the connectivity us gays can experience. Any lack of direct exposure to the gay community is augmented by the direct access to our own personal online world.

“We can get caught up in the potential of a
relationship that the expectations grow bigger.”


We need to accept a potential reality.
There can be a disconnect between your online persona and your real-life personality. You can send lengthy emails fully disclosing your harrowing life story and countless agreeable texts describing similar interests, but there’s always going to be gaps you can’t fill with the written word. The absence of real-life human companionship allows your mind to run free to envision the most perfect first date and the most perfect real connection.
We can get caught up in the potential of a relationship that the expectations grow far bigger than reality can offer. You may be standing in front of a perfectly decent guy, but he’s standing in the shadow of your own imagination. Any excitement you had is replaced with a sense of disappointment neither of you deserve.

I’m not discouraging the use of a digital dating scene, but I’m encouraging expediting the time it takes to actually meet. You do need more information than Grindr’s abbreviated profile of height and ethnicity.
There is no better test of compatibility than one in which your eyes can see more than words on a screen and your fingers can touch more than just a keyboard. How has an online date not met your expectations?




Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
 
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city. Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
Don’t get fooled by FREE offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a free 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101