This story was first published in April 2024. Some details may have changed since.
The girls have missed a lot in two years. Elections, slang, three separate renaissances. But one thing never needed updating: the power bottom remains the hardest-working man in show business. So while we rebuild this place, let’s start with a classic.
What is a power bottom?
In gay slang, a power bottom is a bottom who takes an active, dominant role during sex — while being the one penetrated. He’s not along for the ride. He IS the ride. The job description:
- Setting the pace, rhythm and angles — riding like it’s a spin class you’re paying for
- Communicating what he wants, clearly, mid-moment, no decoder ring required
- Stamina. Plural rounds. Hydration recommended.
- Challenging the tired old idea that bottoming means being passive
The point isn’t the label. The point is agency: you can be the one on the receiving end and still be fully, gloriously in charge.
Signs you might be one
Think you have what it takes? Here are the signs:
- You love bottoming and embrace it with your whole chest
- You get genuine satisfaction from controlling the tempo — edging, teasing, running the show from below
- You say what you want in the moment. No guessing games.
- You can go round after round without calling a time-out
- You feel a sense of accomplishment afterward, like you just finished a workout you actually enjoyed
- You’re verse but lean hard toward bottoming
If three or more of those felt like a personal attack, congratulations: you may be a power bottom.
Becoming one
Nobody is born a power bottom. It’s a craft, and crafts are learned:
- Core strength, flexibility, cardio — squats are a love language
- Kegels. Your pelvic floor is an instrument. Tune it.
- Experiment with positions and toys during solo play to learn what works for your body
- Say what you want out loud, with partners, before and during
- Practice. Repetition is the whole curriculum.
And the ground rules never change: protection, plenty of lube, and a pace your body actually agrees to. Listen to your limits — they’re the only reviewer that matters.
Owning it
The world spent decades equating bottoming with submission, and it was wrong, and it was boring. Being a power bottom is a radical act of sex-positivity: strong, assertive and in control, exactly as you are. So if this is you — own it. Ask for what you want. Take up space. You’ve got the power. 😤
While you’re here: what does being a power bottom really mean?
