We search for happiness every day by doing the things we enjoy and just by living life to the fullest. However, there are moments when we wish that we could share these amazing experiences with someone special. Some people are fortunate enough to have finally met their one true love while others are still waiting to find their soulmate.
Indeed, love comes in many forms but perhaps the most elusive one is finding that perfect person with whom you can spend the rest of your life. In some instances, it comes when we least expect it, and other times, when we need it the most. Whether you are a believer in true love or not, this article is for you.
Be your best version of yourself.
The first advice that we can give you is to simply BE YOURSELF – the version of yourself that makes you the happiest and where you feel most comfortable.
You don’t have to try to be someone else or pretend to adapt a personality totally different from your own just because you want to please someone. Let that person love you for who you are inside and out.
Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life.
Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet someone special.
Focus outward, not inward.
To combat first-date nerves, focus your attention on what your date is saying and doing and what’s going on around you, rather than on your internal thoughts. Staying fully present in the moment will help take your mind off worries and insecurities.
Be curious. When you’re truly curious about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, stories, and opinions, it shows—and they’ll like you for it. You’ll come across as far more attractive and interesting than if you spend your time trying to promote yourself to your date. And if you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there’s little point in pursuing the relationship further.
Find your crowd and have fun.
Finding your crowd means being with people with the same interests as yours and going to places where you belong. Having a zone where you can express who you are also means being part of a world where you can freely shine your brightest.
Most often than not, in this crowd, you would find someone who loves the same things that you do.
Be open to new experiences.
Go out and have fun. Your comfort zone is a place where you can just be yourself and just forget the world, but if you want someone to be a part of your life, you either have to let people in, or you get out of it.
Be open to explore new opportunities and experiences.
Don’t be afraid to meet new people.
If you happen to meet someone interesting, given the right time and circumstances, don’t be afraid to say hello. Striking a conversation with a perfect stranger is okay as long as you know what to say – or sometimes even if you just don’t say anything. Let your smile do the talking.
Handle rejection gracefully.
At some point, everyone looking for love is going to have to deal with rejection—both as the person being rejected and the person doing the rejecting. It’s an inevitable part of dating, and never fatal. By staying positive and being honest with yourself and others, handling rejection can be far less intimidating. The key is to accept that rejection is an inevitable part of dating but to not spend too much time worrying about it. It’s never fatal.
Don’t take it personally. If you’re rejected after one or a few dates, the other person is likely only rejecting you for superficial reasons you have no control over or because they are unable to overcome their own issues. Be grateful for early rejections—it can spare you much more pain down the road.
Watch for relationship red flags.
Red-flag behaviors can indicate that a relationship is not going to lead to healthy, lasting love. Trust your instincts and pay close attention to how the other person makes you feel. If you tend to feel insecure, ashamed, or undervalued, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.
Deal with trust issues.
Mutual trust is a cornerstone of any close personal relationship. Trust doesn’t happen overnight; it develops over time as your connection with another person deepens. However, if you’re someone with trust issues—someone who’s been betrayed, traumatized, or abused in the past, or someone with an insecure attachment bond—then you may find it impossible to trust others and find lasting love.
If you have trust issues, your romantic relationships will be dominated by fear—fear of being betrayed by the other person, fear of being let down, or fear of feeling vulnerable. But it is possible to learn to trust others. By working with the right therapist or in a supportive group therapy setting, you can identify the source of your mistrust and explore ways to build richer, more fulfilling relationships.
So you’ve finally found some special. Now, what should you do to make love last?
Do your part.
For a relationship to work, one must do their part. Both of you should share the responsibility of making an effort to keep the love alive. Be romantic, be faithful, and always let your love be felt. Moreover, apologize when you’ve done something wrong and, when the lessons are learned, choose to forgive.
One very special kind of love is the love we find from someone who is willing to give both their time and attention just to get to know us, to try and make us happy without asking anything in return, to promise us that they would spend the rest of their life with us in sickness and health, come what may.
Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
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