Good and Bad Conversation Topics for a Successful First Date
Ah, the first date. Where great relationships begin, or stumble into awkward, dead-end conversation. To have a great conversation you often have to ask an open question and then follow up to the other person’s response with statements. Try not to ask a reel of questions. Instead, ask a question; listen…
Blurred Lines: Can You Stay Friends With An Ex?
There are a plethora of reasons why you can technically remain friends with someone after dating them. But still, should you be friends with an ex? Depending on how long you were in a relationship with your ex, chances are you were in love with them. And regardless of the reason you broke…
Gay Relationships: Dealing with a Bully, Abusive Boyfriend
Love can blind us to bullying in unforeseen ways. You probably won’t see it until years down the line, and even then you still try and mask it with past memories—“Somewhere inside is that man I fell in love, so I’m going to keep on keeping on.” Sometimes boyfriends change…
Atlanta Gay Guide: Which Bars Are Smoke-Free?
For Atlantans who prefer their nights out without the pungent scent of cigarette smoke the morning after, the past few months have created a much wider range of bar options. Every week, it seems like another bar is announcing that they’ve restricted smoking. The reasons tend to boil down to…
Cut The Crackpot: Dealing with Crazy People
Crazy folks – everybody got them! Not the mental illness but people who are rational most of the time but have one area of life where they just see cross eyed. How many crazy gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? The longer you try and make sense…
Relationship Advice: Facing a Fear of Commitment
Ever read advice columns? I don’t think they could exist without letters from women dating guys who can’t commit. It’s almost a cliché: “Joe and I have been dating for 7 years now, and he still hasn’t asked me to marry him. What’s wrong?” Gay men are probably no different from…
Why Self-Compassion Trumps Self-Esteem
Is self-compassion more important than self-esteem? It’s typical for human beings to become a replica of how we’re treated by the world and those closest to us. If we’re treated like a victim, it’s easy to make that the baseline of our self-worth. When we’re talked down upon, it’s easy…
PDX Gay Guide: LGBT Portland Sports and Recreation
Located only a few hours from the beach, the mountains and the high desert, Portland is a sports and wilderness lover’s fantasy come true. In addition to regional outdoors offerings, Portland offers a wide range of hiking, biking and water sports within city limits. LGBTQ visitors can partake in exciting…
Top Common Reasons Why Gay Relationships Work and Fail
“Society desperately needs to see healthy gay couples functioning in successful relationships.” Back in the 90’s, I worked at Linden Oaks Hospital, a psychiatric clinic in Naperville, Illinois in their outpatient department providing counseling to all ages and populations.We did a lot of work with couples and used a handout…
Ex with Benefits: Bad Idea or Harmless Fun?
Running into your ex is common in the LGBT community, especially when you’re in a gay neighborhood. At the gym, in the bar, or on the streets, we’re bound to run into an old fling at some point or other. Sure it might be a bit awkward, but what happens…
Gay Relationships: Exploring the Power of Sexual Fantasies
Jack and Matt are both buttoned-down businessmen and have been together for ten years. They’ve been inseparable since Jack picked Matt up one night after cruising him for hours at the dance bar they frequent. The seduction was hot: eye contact led to physical contact, then making out in a dark…
Popular Gay-Friendly Things To Do in Boston
I stop my bike along Boston Harbor and take a deep, long inhale of the fresh sea breeze that flows off the water. Immediately, I am transported from the energetic urban life of the city to a small New England town. I look out at the view along the waterway…