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Gay Dating: 5 Rules To Have A Good Blind Date

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Posted by Joseph on January 29, 2015
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You might be surprised to know that the gay community has the most blind dates than any group in America. And no, Grindr hook ups do not count as a gay blind date. I’m referring to actual meetings with strangers in public places to build a connection, hoping to develop a long lasting relationship… okay I admit, it does sound a lot like Grindr.

But listen, blind dates are difficult for both parties. Yet for whatever reason, they often result in some of the most successful relationships. They’re exciting, fun, and totally don’t deserve the wrap it often gets. This is why you need to prepare yourself beforehand so it can be the best experience possible.
  • Plan Your Date Together – Make sure you have a detailed plan. There’s nothing more awkward than showing up and planning off the cuff. This gives you more time to focus on him.
  • Don’t Talk About Sexual Positions – Though you both are probably thinking it, don’t ask each other if you’re a top or bottom. This will only make it about sex. Focus on the chemistry.
  • Have Ice Breakers – Have at least five ice breakers that are related to not only your interests, but possibly the location of your date. Fun facts are nice to have in your back pocket.
  • Coming Out Stories – A lot of gay men break the ice by asking about their family and if they are out to them. Be careful with this, it may be sticky territory. You are not familiar with their situation yet. Stay away from this topic until later on in the date (possibly the second).
  • Separate Vehicles – This is safety 101. He might be a creep, mentally unstable, or simply not a match. Don’t be held prisoner at your own date. Make sure you have a clean way of leaving should you need to.
  • Don’t Give Personal Info – Try not to give out your phone number or work info until the end of the date. Emails are fabulous, and a lot of dating websites have Instant Messaging that are easily usable.
  • Screen him – Social media is fabulous for these kinds of things. Not only can you get a sense of his personality beforehand, but you can find out his interests which will help you in the date. If you are meeting through a mutual friend, get more info from the friend.
  • Find The Fun – Know that he is probably not going to be your future husband, so in the meantime, just have fun. Dating is supposed to be fun so try to make it as easy going as possible. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself.
  • Agree To Be Honest – From the get go, it might be a good strategy to support honesty in one another. If one of you doesn’t sense a connection, there isn’t a need to carry on. Discuss this before you meet, it will ease your anxiety.
  • Don’t Lie To Impress – Be Yourself. There’s no need to try and make yourself look better than you are – he will always find out. Most likely, he screened you beforehand as well. Plus, if you hit it off and go on more dates, you will be forced to confess the truth at some point.
  • Separate Checks – Don’t pay for his bill, and don’t let him pay for yours. This is an unspoken “debt” that will need to be repaid, aka: a second date. Plus it shows power. A blind date should remain as balanced as possible.
  • Don’t Use Your Phone – This is rude and totally creates a wall, making him feel unimportant and overlooked. Put it away and don’t take it out unless you’re doing math or taking a picture.
  • Don’t Get Drunk – Clarity is crucial. Know your limits and tolerance. Getting tipsy is fun and could be okay, but don’t go overboard. This can turn you from a gentleman into a hot mess in a matter of seconds.
  • Don’t Show Any Disgust – If he isn’t your type or says something that turns you off, stay centered. He may be nervous, cut him some slack and give him the benefit of the doubt. Give chemistry time to blossom.
  • Expect The Worse – Go in expecting the worst and hoping for the best. This way, no matter what happens, at least it’s better than what you had imagined.




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