It doesn’t matter what kind of relationship you’re getting
into, there will always be rules. Rules are good because they maintain
structure and let you know what’s acceptable and what isn’t. All couples will
eventually set their own rules, but those are more personal and come into play
once you start dating long-term. So if you’re just getting into a new
relationship, there are some universal gay dating rules you should follow.
Remember, these aren’t hard-and-fast rules that will wholly apply to every
single one of you, but some version of the following rules should be
incorporated into your new relationship guidelines:
Don’t Fall For “Almost”
When you find out that an amazing guy has a boyfriend
already, and he’s still making the moves on you, stay far away. It doesn’t
matter if he says his boyfriend is an abusive drunk, you will not engage with
him. Don’t ever fall for “almost” when he says they’ve almost broken up;
because when one wants to break up, they should break up and not gallivant
around town with another hot guy (that’s you). Let him cheat with somebody
else, you don’t want to be that guy, trust us. The Universe has these karmic
laws that will come around to bite you in the butt. Also, remember, if he’s cheating
with you, what’s stopping him from cheating on you?
Invite = Pay
In hetero dating back in the old days, the gentleman always
paid for the lady. Now, even the straight folk are more equal when it comes to
paying, and if the girl wants to pay, she pays. When it comes to two gay guys
on a date, the question of who pays always comes up. The rule is, if you are
the one who invited them on a date and picked out the restaurant then you pay.
If they invited you, they pay. It’s quite simple, really. It’s also much more
progressive than “the guy always pays” or “whoever makes more money will pick
up the check” even though the latter is more practical. It just isn’t romantic
to say “I know you didn’t make rent last month so please, let me.”
Window Shopping
It’s like when you’re browsing through a store you love with
no intention of buying anything, but the sales guy doesn’t know that, so he
tries his best to convince you. Every date you go out with doesn’t have to be
Mr. Right. It’s okay to not ask for a second date, you don’t have to be stuck
with someone you don’t particularly like or hit it off with. Tell them
politely, and don’t leave them hanging though. Call them up the next day and
say something like, “I’m sorry, you’re great but I just don’t think we can get
any further with this.” You’re just browsing, you may like how the sweater
looks, but this just isn’t the appropriate weather for it.
Don’t worry too much about the rules when you find a guy you
really like. Some rules are meant to be broken, after all.