For those of us not in a relationship, the 14^th of February is a reminder of how lover-less we actually are. It’s akin to being back in high school when everyone had partnered up in science class and you were left dissecting a frog by yourself.

Being gay on Valentine’s Day is particularly difficult because our relationships rarely last past the 6-month mark. This means that you need to strategically plan your relationship so that it coincides with Valentine’s Day.

Just because you don’t have a significant other doesn’t mean you can’t have an awesome Valentine’s Day! Here’s some tips to actually enjoy Valentine’s Day if you’re single and queer.

1. Do not define yourself by your relationship status. Your relationship status is not your identity.
2. Have a romantic morning/afternoon by yourself. Have a glass of wine (or four). Take a bubble bath. Order in food from your favorite restaurant. Buy yourself chocolates. There’s no reason you need someone else to spoil YOU!
3. Make a list of all the reasons why you’re a “good catch.”
4. Another great idea to spend your VD by yourself is to immerse into either new activities that you’ve always wanted to try or the ones that you love but rarely get the chance to do.
5. Have a one-night stand. Yes, you read that right. Fight off any Valentine’s Day blues by going on gay dating app or website and find someone to spend a sexy night with. Valentine’s Day is not only supposed to be romantic, but sexy as well, and by doing this you will tick one of those. However, there are plenty of gays who do not feel quite comfortable doing this thing, so if you’re one of them, make sure to choose another way to spend the most romantic night of the year.
6. Meditate! Even if you are not a spiritual person, it is good to relax, empty your mind, take stock of the day, and check on your emotional and mental well-being. Your mental and emotional selves need love too, so you will be better off for it.
7. Energy transfers. So, spend time with people who help you flow with positivity. Being single on valentines day does not mean you HAVE to be alone on valentines day if you do not want to be. Call a friend or a loved one you have not seen in some time, and spend the day with them. V-Day is not only about the romantic loves, it’s about the platonic loves as well.
8. Get your celebrity crush on and have a movie marathon with your favorite Hollywood Hunk.
9. Realize that Valentine’s Day is a commercial holiday. It is not about love and relationships; it is about selling flowers, stuffed toys, jewelry, etc. Think of all the money you are saving.
10. Love yourself! Whatever you decide to do on Valentine’s Day – this year or any year – make sure you do something that makes you feel good. Whether it be spending time with that special someone, or especially alone, remember it’s just another day to express love toward someone.

While some of these options may seem cheesy, the true mission here is to pull yourself out of the doldrums and to initiate a positive direction for yourself that will improve your quality of life.

The hope is by day’s end, you’ll feel more empowered and upbeat about your life, and the beauty about this checklist is you can carry it over into February 15 and beyond for maximum impact.

You’ll be great!

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