fbpx

Gay Men News

Bringing the Best in LGBTQ to you

Why I’m Doing the AIDS Walk: For My Mother and New York

Why I’m Doing the AIDS Walk: For My Mother and New York image
Gay Dating Tips
Posted by Joseph on April 10, 2018
32 views

Everyone has personal reasons for raising money for HIV causes. This is Alexander Cheves’s.

 

Here’s my favorite childhood memory. I was about 10 years old. My mother and I were in New York City to see The Lion King on Broadway. I’m sure the show was fantastic, but I remember my mother more than the play. She transformed on the streets of New York before my eyes.

It’s remarkable when you realize your parents have separate lives, separate identities. They are not a unit of one. My father was a dogmatic presence. He judged the world by a rigorous ethic: Excess is a sign of liberal, secular decadence. He practiced an uncompromising religiosity, refused to eat at “white tablecloth restaurants,” fixed his own farm equipment, and distrusted people with expensive cars and stylish clothes. He was hot-tempered and rough.

 

My mother, I always believed, was his sidekick, the softness to balance his hardness, the adjacent bolster to his furor. But over two days in New York City, she became something else. She wore a coat I have never seen her wear before or since. It was wool, calf-length, with a Native American pattern on it, dashes of crimson, brown, and olive running down the back.

I followed her through the glass city. She knew where to go. We walked up escalators and down stone steps, through clothing stores and halls of perfume. Gone was the woman I knew before. She was regal and confident. We went to the Statue of Liberty and took pictures of ourselves at the tip of the ferry, waving back at home with the statue behind us. My mother hailed taxis like she had done it a hundred times. She was a bohemian businesswoman enjoying Central Park with her son. I followed behind her in awe.

For two days, the city was freezing, but it refused to snow. On our last night, as we walked out of the play, a light snowfall started in Times Square. The city went silent. There was no one around. We tiptoed through the snow, past the illuminated billboards, unable to speak. In that moment, it was me and my mother and no one else in the world.

Two days ago, my mother donated $100 to my fundraising efforts for AIDS Walk New York. This will be my first AIDS Walk. I moved to Manhattan one month ago and wanted to show my love to the greatest city in the world. My parents moved me here. On the trip, I watched my father — softened in my years away from home. Where had that gray hair come from?

And my mother, huddled against the cold of the street, near tears as I wave goodbye. I remember when I told her I had HIV. I called her from Los Angeles to tell her I was going public with a secret I had kept from her and everyone else in my family for three years. “I’m fine,” I assured her. “I’m on meds and taking care of myself. I just wanted you to know.”

She called me later that day to tell me she was sorry — sorry that she hadn’t been supportive when she needed to be, sorry I had felt unable to tell her when I first tested positive. I needed to hear it. I was standing in the parking lot of a movie theater hearing my mother tell me that she wished she had been there to help me get through those first years. I wish she had too. “It’s OK, Mom,” I told her. “I made it. It’s OK.”

The AIDS Walk is for many people. It’s for the queer men and women who’ve fallen to this unimaginable and relentless disease, for the many more who will die before we find a cure, and for the trans, brown, black, undocumented, Latinx, genderqueer, and nonbinary people still under attack, still underserved and unreached in their battle against HIV and AIDS.

It’s for the many mothers whose sons never told them, “I’m going to be fine.” How many more do we need to lose? In a different decade, my mother would have lost me. I live, and I run for her.

Please consider donating to my fundraising page: NY.AIDSWalk.net/alexlovesnewyork.

ALEXANDER CHEVES is a New York-based writer. Follow him on Twitter @BadAlexCheves.

 

 

Read more at: The Advocate Magazine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you found the right one, or are you still searching?
Join a gay dating site where you can meet single guys from any town or city.
Rely instead on Gay Dating Solutions to do the work for you!
 
Don’t get fooled by free offers made by other sites. Gay Dating Solutions is offering a FREE 6 month promotion ABSOLUTELY no strings, request for credit card numbers, etc…it is the only site that is truly free to join!
 
Download our mobile apps: https://appurl.io/jd0jaqp0
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/GayDating101

Tags: #BigBankChallenge #BohemianKissChallenge #EqualityActJapan #StopAsianHate 2020 Olympics Aaron Schock Adam Castillejo Adam Rippon addiction ageism Aging AhTave AIDS Aime Wichtendal Alaska Alex Morse Almost Love America's Next Top Model American Medical Association Amy Coney Barrett Annise Parker Antes Que El Mundo Se Acabe Anti-Asian Violence Anti-LGBTQ ANTM anxiety Aptima HIV-1 Arizona Armie Hammer astrology At-home date Atlanta Atlanta Black Pride Atlanta Nightlife Atlanta Pride Atlanta Pride Run Austin Swink Austin Texas Backpacks for the Street Basel Abou Hamrah BFI Flare Bisexual BLACK GAY MEN Black LGBTQ Atlanta Black Lives Matter Black Love Bohemian Rhapsody Boston Boston MA Brian Sims Broadway bully Bullying California Call Me By Your Name Canada Capital Pride Capitalism Cason Crane Celebrity News censorship Chemistry Chemsex Chicago Chicago IL Chris Evans Christian proselytizing Christianity Christmas Christmas movie Christmas Movies Chucky Circus of Books civil unions Cody McCook Colorado Comedy coming out commentary compatibility Confidence Congress conspiracy theory Conversion therapy CoronaVirus COVID COVID-19 Covid-19 vaccine daddy Dallas Dallas Gay Bars Dallas Gayborhood Dallas Texas Danica Roem Daniel Harding Daniel Howell Date night dating Dating Apps dating rut dating tips DC Pride Dead to Me Denver Depression discrimination Disney Documentary Dolf Pasker Dolly Parton Domestic Violence Donald Trump Donna Price Drag Race drag racing Dustin Lance Black election Election 2020 Election Day Elite Employment Entertainment Entertainment news epidemic Fabio Fasoli Family family gatherings Film Finding True Love First Date First Date Etiquette first date ideas first date tips Flirting Tips Flirty Dancing Florida Fort Lauderdale Franklin Graham Freddie Mercury Garrett Clayton gay gay asian gay asian men Gay Atlanta Gay Bars NYC Gay beaches Gay Boston Gay Chicago Gay Couple Gay Couples Gay Culture Gay Dallas Gay Dallas Nightlife gay dating gay dating advice gay dating app gay dating apps Gay Dating Solutions Gay Dating Tips Gay DC gay discrimination gay film Gay Florida Gay Fort Lauderdale Gay Health Gay Holiday Movie Gay Houston gay kiss Gay Love Advice gay marriage gay marriage proposal gay men Gay Miami gay midlife Gay Mountaineer Gay Movies Gay New York Gay Nurse Gay NYC Gay Panic Gay Pride gay relationship advice gay relationship tips gay relationships Gay Scene gay seniors gay sex gay singles Gay Soldier Gay Travel Gay Twitter Gay Washington DC Gay Wedding gay weddings Gay Widower Gays Over COVID gaysian Gen Z Generation Z Georgia Gert Kasteel Ghosting GLAAD GOP Gorsuch Guy Vandenberg Gym Gays Haaz Sleiman Hallmark Halloween Hate Crime Health HGVT HIV HIV prevention HIV stigma HIV treatment HIV vaccine HIV/AIDS hobbies Holi-date Holiday Film Holiday Movies Holidays Hollywood Holyoke Homophobia hooking up hookup hookup culture Hot Vax Summer House Hunters Houston Texas Houston TX Hulu Ian Jordan Indya Moore Instagay Instagram intersex Intimacy Iowa Iowa caucus isolation It's A Sin Jake Gyllenhaal James Bushe Japan Jaymes Vaughan Jayson Conner Jeffrey Newman Jennifer Tilly Jewish Jewish persecution Joe Biden Jonathan Bennett Josef Salvat Jussi-Pekka Kajaala Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg JVN Jwan Yosef Karamo Brown Kristine Stolakis Lady Gaga Lesbian lesbian couple Let It Snow LGBT LGBT Travel Guide LGBT-Free Zones LGBTQ LGBTQ Asians LGBTQ Atlanta LGBTQ Boston LGBTQ Chicago LGBTQ Dallas LGBTQ discrimination LGBTQ employees LGBTQ Family LGBTQ Film LGBTQ Film Festival LGBTQ Films LGBTQ flag LGBTQ Fort Lauderdale LGBTQ Health LGBTQ Houston LGBTQ Miami LGBTQ movies LGBTQ New York LGBTQ NYC LGBTQ Pride LGBTQ retirees LGBTQ retirement LGBTQ Rights LGBTQ Seniors LGBTQ Victory Institute LGBTQ Youth Life Lifetime Lifetime TV Network Linda Warren lockdown London LGBTIQ+ Film Festival loneliness Love Victor Luke Evans Male Nurse Malik Brown marriage equality marriage proposal Marsha P Johnson Marvel Marvin Cortes Massachusetts mature gay dating mental health Mexico Miami Miami Beach Miami Beach Pride Miami Florida Michael Cashman Michael Henry Middle-aged gay men midlife Modern Family mormon Mr. Right Muscle gays music video My Gay Match NASCAR National Coming Out Day Nationwide Conversion Therapy Ban Neil Gorsuch Netflix Netflix Special Nevada New Year's Resolution New York New York City Nonbinary North Dakota Northern Ute tribe Nurse Appreciation Week NYC NYC Events NYC Pride NYC Pride 2021 Oak Lawn Obergefell v. Hodges older gay man Omander Omar Ayuso One True Pairing online dating online dating apps online dating tips online gay dating Online trolls Open Relationship Operation Hyacinth OTP Outfest Outfest LA 2021 Outfest Los Angeles Pan-African Pride pandemic Paper Moons Pat Robertson Pennsylvania Perez Hilton personality personality type Pete Buttigieg Pink Capitalism Poland Politics polyamorous polyamorous relationship polyamorous relationships Pope Francis Pose power bottom Pray Away PrEP pride Pride 2021 Pride Afrique Pride Flag Pride Month Prince Harry profile pic Puerto Vallarta quarantine Queer eye Queer Film Queer Films Queer Holiday Movies Queer Lawmakers Queer Love Story Queer Santa Queer Youth racism Rafa Olarra Rainbow Wave Reddit Relationship relationship advice Relationship Tips relationships religion Rep. Andy Biggs Republican retirement Ricky Martin rom-com Romantic Comedy Ryan Murphy Ryan O’Connell Samaritan’s Purse same sex marriage Same Sex Relationships Same Sex Wedding Same-Sex Couples Same-Sex Kiss same-sex marriage ban Schitt’s Creek Score Miami Score Nightclub Scott Evans Scott Wiener Section 28 self isolation self-care Senior Gay Dating Senior Gay Men senior gays Senior Prom Seven Summits sex Sex Education sex life sexual identity sexual preference sexual racism sexuality short film Shy Gay Guys Single All the Way single gay man Single Gay Men Single Gays Single Young Gays social distancing social isolation social media Social Security Somerville sports Stonewall Stonewall Riots straight men Super Bowl ads Super Bowl commercials Super Bowl LIV Supreme Court Switzerland Syfy Syria Tan France Television Tennessee The Boys in the Band The Center on Colfax The Christmas Setup The Eternals The First The Thing About Harry Threesome throuple TikTok Tom Daley toxic masculinity Transgender Travel Travis Shumake true love Trump administration Turner Free TV series Tweets Twitter Unconditional Love United Methodist Church US economy US Supreme Court Valentine's day viral video Virginia Washington DC Web Series Wedding Workplace workplace discrimination World AIDS Day World Pride young gay men Youth YouTube

Comments
Why I’m Doing the AIDS Walk: For My Mother and New York – Real Gay dating

[…] post Why I’m Doing the AIDS Walk: For My Mother and New York appeared first on Gay Men […]

Leave a reply

Related articles
image for Gay Dating: Finding Your Right Match After 40
Gay Dating: Finding Your Right Match After 40

Dating of any age can be quite intimidating and even more so as you get older especially if you're hitting 40 and over.

More
image for 7 Quick Dating Tips For Young Gay Men
7 Quick Dating Tips For Young Gay Men

Undoubtedly, dating is a tough job and even more when you belong to the LGBTQ community because of the societal taboos associated with it.

More
image for Gay Dating After 60: How to Fall In Love Again
Gay Dating After 60: How to Fall In Love Again

If you’re a single gay man over 60 entering the world of mature gay dating, there’s a good chance you haven’t dated in a long while.

More
image for Top Tips For Dating An Older Gay Man
Top Tips For Dating An Older Gay Man

While dating an older gay man is no longer a big deal, age-gap relationships do come with their unique set of challenges.

More
image for Online Gay Dating Tips for Seniors: How to Make it Easy & Fun
Online Gay Dating Tips for Seniors: How to Make it Easy & Fun

Senior gay dating can be a nerve-racking prospect but finding the right partner can make the experience worth the effort. Gay men looking for love in later life can find it tricky to know where to start with senior gay dating, particularly if they have recently come out of a…

More